Hey guys!

I've been composing for about two months now...and I really think that a little guidance can take me the extra mile. I'm kind of anxious about posting my music here, because I know that some amazing composers and arrangers frequent this forum, but if you guys wouldn't mind looking over some of my stuff, I would really appreciate it...

Over the past two months...actually a little less...I've written about 25 songs...some of them more like good ideas to be fleshed out and developed in the future...I am, on good faith, posting five of my pieces with this thread...I hope someone likes them!....

And please, newbie though I am, if you have negative comments (and I'm sure there will be plenty) post them too...I can't get better if I get no criticism!

If any of you actually enjoy any of this and want to hear more, I've posted my songs on the Finale Showcase. Just use the names of the songs in the search and use them to get to the rest of them....

I hope you guys like them!

All Holow's Eve ~

I really enjoyed listening to this piece... I was especially fond of the dissonances throughout (dissonance in music is one of my favourite effects) and how little the song developed... Now, usually one would want a song to have a lot of development, but--for me--it somehow worked because of how I pictured the piece... a still, still night with mist... those things, when in their purest form, are pretty static, so it makes sense for the music to realize that as well.

Even though the melody got a little repetitive as the piece carried along, my interest was still kept by the accompaniment. The accompaniment was fairly simple throughout, but that's where I heard the little bit of development (what I was talking about earlier). Nothing too drastic by any means, but enough to notice a difference... that, in my opinion, was very effective for the mood. The ending was all wrong, though... Well, not all wrong, but I was expecting a gentle fading away... the way you have it now is, in my opinion, too brash for such a delicate setting.

As for the title... I wasn't really getting the whole feel of "All Hallow's Eve". Like I said earlier, I saw a sort of misty night, so you're heading in the right direction. But, as of now, it's not quite there yet (unless, of course, you changed the title to A Still, Still Night with Mist, but that would be a little too indulgent). :P

Speaking of the title, was Holow's an intentional misspelling that has some sort of underlying sentimental value, or was it just misspelled? XD These are very important things, my friend!

Anyway, yeah... this is really a lovely piece.

In the Silence ~

Again, I'm puzzled by the title choice; it's kinda funny to hear how people interpret silence... with something other than silence. :heh: That could be more of the kind of "mode" I'm in right now (where I try to analyze music visually rather than exclusively musically), but it's still a bit of an obstacle because I couldn't see myself being enveloped in a lack of sound, nor could I see anything else wrapped in nothingness.

As for the music, though... The accompaniment was a little bit too repetitive for my taste. It made sense in context of what I saw (an open music box playing in a dingy nursery with curtains flapping in a gentle breeze), but I'm sure that's not what you were going for. There was also not a lot going on in the melody, which worked against the piece. And at that really big crescendo--yes, I saw it XD--I was expecting some more development... something more than the simple change in register for the accompaniment; it made the melody stand out a little more (which was good), but there was so much emptiness in between that yearned for some filling... maybe an extra instrument! At least, that's what I expected at that point.

I didn't enjoy this one as much as All Holow's Eve because it lacked a lot of its charm. But they are two completely different pieces... so it may just be me.

-=-=-=-=-

I'll look at some more later... I need some sleep!

I'm not a great composer myself, I've been composing for about a half year (well... I have other things to think about than composing, most of the time, so I don't really get time composing more like once or twice a month), just recently i tried to be more serious about it, but you have composed more than I have... I still will try to tell you my opinion. Oh yeah... I'm really bad with terms in music... So I will just write whatever pops in my head without trying to think if there even is a musical term for it, if I don't know it already.

All Hallow's Eye
I think it's a good piece, but I got kinda bored after a while. But still i like.

In the Silence
The left hand is too repetetive. And when it has changed to some thing new, it's pretty much the same, before changing back to the same.

Ghoul's Dance
It felt very random from measure 12 and onwards. Switching like that made me confused. I've never heard it before and really noticed it. I know I have heard it before, but then it didn't feel so confusing and suprising.
The diminuedos and cresendos are kinda out of place som times, I think. I really don't like this one. Not at all.

Unfathomable Love
I wonder... Do you use some kind of pattern when composing the right hand?
Measure 72-74 was like it was a sudden end, then the ending came afterwards. It didn't sound well to me.

Footsteps
This was good, I can't find any faults with my low skill composer ears.

So... I think you are a good composer (I can't say your bad, like me. I've heard alot of awful compositions, and these are not like them), but there is always room for improvement. Even though my opinions doesn't help you, you might think about it, next time?

You seem to have potential to make some pretty nice compositions, so I'll take the time to critique you compositions you've posted and also a little guidance. . .hopefully I won't make you mad with what I am about to say. :)

All Holow's Eve ~

This piece starts out pretty nicely with an atonal atmosphere; you create a good understanding of a Hollow's Eve, very eerie (sp?). The chord progression is nice, but it's this type of progression that should be used for an introduction since it is very cliche. The sad part about that is you used the progression and melody over and over again-literally throughout the entire piece. This comes to me pointing out how a progression, especially such as this, shouldn't be repeated over and over and over again for the entire piece; as comments have suggested it gets boring and quite simplistic. . .I would have to strongly disagree with Nuclear Foetus saying that even though it repeats and doesn't develop, it still sounds OKay. I can agree in pieces with little or no development, but not ones that sound this "dull." And change the last chord. . .way to mashed together for the bass.

In the Silence ~

Again, a very nice introduction with you progression, and a good melody to layer it. . .reminds me a little of the piece "Sadness and Sorrow" from the Naruto Anime. ;) Moving on a little bit, you (again) repeat the progression and melody over quite a bit, and then you throw in some chords in the right hand to give it some more "base." The ending is way too low for the register you had it in the entire time. . .sum of of this piece was (again) very boring and little development.

Ghoul's Dance ~

Ah! Very nice motif for the first measures, it gave it a dance like quality. . .yet change the left hand notes in measures 2 + 6 (they are very weak sounding) and the last note in the left hand on measure 8 (a "bad" dissonace). Heh, then measure 12 comes in with this "beat." XD When I listened to it I knew from the start you were going to have extreme problems keeping this together-mainly keeping it from getting "random" in which it turned out very random when you hand the right hand play the "beat" and the counterpoint notes (which were one of the sole contributors for the random-ness). . .also a hint on piano, the right hand is hardly playable at parts like measures 16-23. Notice I didn't say this was impossible but this is something you would NEVER find in ANY music sheets, as in a bad thing, not something revolutionary like Chopin or Debussy. Also, all through 16-23 is very random and doesn't make any sense-it's all over the place. The second chord in measure 31 is very bad sounding; change it. :heh: It seems like you basically c+p the rest of the piece, yet-73-76 were a nice variate, but the notes were too atonal, just like most of the piece; and your last chord is veeery bad in the left hand, it's the fifth of the tonic, and sounds weak (but not as weak if the third was in the bass, but still very bad). . .you have the same problems as you've had your first two, and I bet you probably see a pattern by now-now you also (probably) have a little grudge aganst me being a this critical, and how my attitude is-so just forgive me on that. ;)

Unfathomable Love ~

Good opening and all, but (again) you repeated this same theme over and over, however, I could see a lot of potential in making this a song for the piano (or a song, in general). Instead of using those chords that your melody, write a melody that sounds like it would be sung (not cantabile, but like a j-pop singer :heh:) I'll just make this short and state that this repeats the same things over and over again. . . .watch out for those chords in the left hand at 64; they're too close together to go that fast and that low. One thing that this piece had that was good was its ending! It made sense and made the piece's closing very appropiate.

Footsteps ~

Besides you notating this in C Major, when the piece was actually in G Major, this one was (by far) you best of all the five. . .definately saved the best for last in this case. :P You had a good sense of melody and harmony; "just don't repeat the same melody over and over". . .yet you made the piano a song and had a different melody after the first one, so good thing you did, or else I'd have to stab you with a spoon. :lol: Jk. Everything else looked good, but you might want to fix your little ending run in measure 46 since it's a little messy, but it fits quite well for the ending.

In conclusion, I hope you will give me some thanks bashing your compositions in which I spent a nice :30 minutes doing. :heh: Nah, but like I said, you seem to have some potential as a good net-composer, so I'd like to be the first to properly critique you.

If you have any questions at all it's best that you would contact people such as Noir7, Sir_Dotdotdot, deathraider, clarinetest, Thorn, One-winged, PorscheGTIII, Klonoa, myself and especially Al for your particular style-interests. (Sorry if I didn't mention someone, but these are the ones I feel have the most capabilities in guiding new composers.)

Good luck!

An Hallow's Eve: I disagree with Mazeppa. This does not sound atonal at all, nor was it eerie. However, I agree to the fact that this is fairly boring and repetitive after a while.

In the Silence: This piece, again, is too repetitive. You can't really capture the audience's attention if you repeat something too much, unless you handle it with meticulous care.

Ghoul's Dance: Surely it has the spirit of a dance, however, it lacks the quality of a dance. Furthermore, you should work on the harmony of the piece, it's fairly weak.

Thanks for all the comments...

I still don't really know much about the technicalities of music...so I'll sift through the terminology and take what I can from it...

By the way...it was my mistake...I did misspell All Hallow's Eve...sorry for the over sight...I'll take care not to post anything at that hour ever again!:sweat:

Special thanks to Mazeppa and Nuclear Foetus for your especially in depth comments. They all burned and I needed every one of them! (The burning means it's working! ;) )

As for my choices in titles...most of them were b/c I simply needed something to call then for the sake of organization...In the Silence was a special one for me though...It represents the thoughts that flow through my mind when the rest of the world around me becomes still...everything I push to the side the entire day comes rushing over me when I lie down and am silent...it's not the silence itself that I am naming...but the thoughts...When all is quiet and the darkness surrounds a weary soul, thoughts of joy and sorrow, love and loss, consume the unprotected mind. The thoughts veil all peace so that daylight cannot be sensed in the silence...

Something about that one can't really be felt unless you play it with real emotion...
Lacking that influence...I can definitely see the validity of all the posted statements.

All of these "songs" are just thoughts put down as notes...as most of you made a point of noting...none of my themes were not very well developed and tend to be more than a little repetitive...I'll work on that!:heh:

I'd just like to thank you guys for being honest without being cruel...it helps!:lol: You're a whole lot better at this whole criticism business than those at some others places I post! Thanks!:)

Just adding to the previous comments, so don't expect much :heh:.


All Holow's Eve ~

This piece starts out pretty nicely with an atonal atmosphere; you create a good understanding of a Hollow's Eve, very eerie (sp?).

Accidentals do not always = atonality. Atonality is the using of notes without a "centered key", but this piece is "centered" on C Minor.

Something weird happened on the last chord. :think:

"In the Silence"- The rhythm was (about 90% of the time) predictable.

"Ghoul's Dance"- It didn't flow well. First of all, the left hand didn't work too well, and there's a 9th interval that really bothers me (E and F an octave + 1 interval higher).

All I can think of, for now. :think: *logs off*

Accidentals do not always = atonality. Atonality is the using of notes without a "centered key", but this piece is "centered" on C Minor.

Oh come on, not you too. Stop correcting my comments; when I say things I don't mean them to be 100%, but when you *obviously* have clashes, it's atonal when that is going on.

All of them seemed good to me. They were kinda repetitive though. And...Some parts in ghouls dance I would call impossible....You had more notes than fingers...