I recently made my first composition! (Im a beginner at this...)
Im going to post it here, tell me what you think of it :)

I made it with demo finale, so i cant change the tempo in the middle of the song; and the pauses arent working properly :(.. oh well

no one wants to critique?..
i changed it around a bit, so the saxophones have a break from the repetitive part.. and i changed it to clarinet and flute... but the program makes it sound a little off tune:

tell me what everyone thinks, Im waiting to hear from you's :)
I also made a version, replacing the french horn with a bass guitar because my school doesnt have any french horn players because its that ghetto :sweat: haha

Whoa, I'm impressed. I really liked how you gave the saxes a break from the pattern. Also how you changed the horn part to bass guitar. You're sure this is your first compostion? :shifty: Well anyway a couple of issuses I found.
1) You could have used dynamics much more in this piece, it would improve very much.
2) Although it sounds cooler, it is very hard to play those low notes in the beginning on flute. I would switch it over to clarinet.

:lol:

ty! and yes this is my first haha. it took me a while because im just learning how to transpose in different keys until i found out that you can just paste it and it goes to its key.. -.-'

Ok. i fixed it up.. and added some more dynamics and instruments... Finale (Notepad) 2008:
Critiques are welcome :) If theres any improvements i should make id like to know ^.^

For some reason in the midi or mp3, the clarinet doesnt sound like a clarinet.. sounds like some sort of drum. I dont know how to fix it lol

Well for one, don't confuse Finale Notepad 2008 with Finale 2008. VERY different.

Your chord progression is very uninteresting and your melody is non-existent. There's nothing to interest your audience or build tension; dynamics alone won't do it in this case. Furthermore, make sure you plan out your chords better; some of your doublings and stuff make your chords sound very weak and make it sound like really amateurish music.

Sorry, I realize I'm being harsh. Keep trying, though!

Well... it's my first.. so ill keep that in mind :P

If you do...

File> Save As> Save as Type> MIDI File (*.MID)

...I'm sure you would probably get more responses. ;)

Ok, ty :)
The clarinet in my midi sounds like an out of tune bell?... its not supposed to be like that :s haha.. i dont know how to fix that >.<

Adding to deathraider's comment: one reason why dynamics alone won't do anything is because it doesn't add anything. All of the instruments are playing at the beginning of the crescendo, and less are playing at the end, so it's a little contradictory, having the crescendo formed that way.

It's also not a great idea to have clarinets trying to be heard with all of the low octave doublings when the clarinets are in that register (meas. 8 to 11). The problem keeps continuing, except with other instruments. One cannot have so many unison doublings and put one instrument on a melody and expect the one instrument to be heard (most of the time).

To me, the percussion got too repetitive after a while... That's pretty much all I have to say. Keep trying!

I found the melody too short and repetitive. Maybe if you make it longer will help the piece, like extending the melody 8 bars that won't sound so alike to the first bars of the melody. At least for me, I think that can improve the melody here by not being so short.

The percussion does get tiring. I think you should stop it in some parts and add contrasting material. I have a very old midi here on Ichigo that does near the same chord progression in the same key signature repeating the four chords. That can make the listener tired of the same if is abused.

For to be your first composition you really wanted to go big!

What is the relation of the tittle of your piece and the music? (Curious).

Keep improving!

Nice comp! ^-^ As deathraider said, Your chord progression is kind of uninteresting. Then again, I guess I'm not the one to talk 'cause I have the same problem. :heh: Great song though!! Much, much better than my first time. ^-^ Looking forward to hearing your future works! :lol: Keep on composing!!!

Edit: Haha, oh and, to me, your bass line parts (Trombone, Baritone, etc.) Were kind of too repetitive for my taste, but I guess that was mostly because of the chord progression. Just thought I might throw that in.

Damn! That's pretty badass for a first song! (my first song sucks so baaaad XD) However, although it sounds pretty cool, it gets very boring after a page or two of the same song over and over. Try adding some variety, but other than that, keep up the good work! =D

What is the relation of the tittle of your piece and the music? (Curious).


Well, I have a friend who actually lives in Ciaro, Egypt,.. and i ask her to send me some music because im interested in cultural stuff (thats what i plan to go to university for to study - languages)... So i just thought up a melody and put it on finale and I wanted to form it so it was the elements (air, water and land). For the egypt part, it sounded like the traditional music that i recieved kind of.. so i named it "The Elements of Egypt"

Thanks guys btw, ill fix it up.. I agree with the repetitive bass parts... I was playing along with it and it gets really boring.. Ill have to add something in there:lol:

For some reason the midi sounds a lot better... I wonder if the .mus I downloaded didn't have the whole file. Some of what I said still applies, but your melody is a lot better than I originally thought.

Unfortunately, I have to agree about the repetitivness. It just kind of seems to go on and on with little variation. Also, maybe a little more substance at the end? Its loud but it doesn't seem full...

oops.......