Hi everyone, this is the scoring thread. I encourage both listeners and arrangers to comment about their thoughts on each arrangement. (That is not yours;))

The scoring will be out of 100:

Creativity 25
Notation 30
Playability 35
Accuracy 10

Where:

Creativity - How altered was it from the original and does it still sound good. Harmonization, counterpoints, emotion triggered can all be considered part of this category

Notation - Details in the notation from bridging the notes to dynamics to the ANYTHING that can be visibly seen on the score. I think for each mistake found, 1points should be deducted from this category. For things such as dynamics, if we see that enough effort was made to reflect the arranger's will then no point is to be deducted, but if not (eg: just mp at the start and the entire piece remains static) 5points would be deducted.

Playability - How easy is it to play. If a song is impossible to play, would it require alot of effort to figure out how to make it playable. If a song is too easy to play, does it still hold the interest of the listener/player if the piece was played 3times consecutively. A 35/35 in my opinion would be a piece that can be played with roughly 3-4weeks of practice by an average pianist with 3years experience. In my understanding, this is about grade 4-6RCM.

Accuracy - How easily can you tell that the song arranged is from the original song.

Since everyone chose to arrange the same piece, I won't bother with the title.

Original: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cy9FlB0MODA

Entries:

DunNotCome: PDF (http://www.mediafire.com/?xaf775ncw3cxtvl) MP3 (http://www.mediafire.com/?at2val1qi51f3b3) Midi (http://www.mediafire.com/?mrxr3j1b7lc3x10)
Sperion: PDF (http://sperion.web.fc2.com/score/tachiagareikariyo.pdf) Midi (http://sperion.web.fc2.com/score/tachiagareikariyo.mid) MP3 (http://www.srcf.ucam.org/~pcfc2/tachiagareikariyo.mp3)
Hinamuffin PDF (http://forums.ichigos.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=14179&d=1313609446) Midi (http://forums.ichigos.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=14180&d=1313609448)
Alpiso: PDF (http://www.box.net/shared/1nt0qtxqnpsro87q7d79) MP3 (http://www.box.net/shared/xhydxev0cvkbf1g7ngsn)
Gotank: PDF (http://forums.ichigos.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=14196&d=1313949144) MP3 (http://forums.ichigos.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=14193&d=1313895563)

Comments regarding each arrangement will be posted on this thread in the upcoming days. Once all comments are posted, the announcement of the winner along with the scores of each entry will be posted on a new thread.

I don't think I'm going to win, since I have like NO dynamics or pedal written into the piece. (didn't think it was neccesary, I kind of am convinced the pianist would rather like to add dynamics by himself XD stupid of me!) And the other pieces are more playable yet better I guess XD Guess I should have put more effort into it.
I don't know which piece I like the most.. Sperion's is more playable and has more variation than DunnotCome's I think... But DunNotCome's is kind of cooler XD Alpiso's is so nice and creative! It's so... non-commercial or how you call it...
I really like everyone's transcriptions! Thank you guys for the pieces and work you did in the past!
Keep up the good work :)

I think you need to fix that Youtube link. :\
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cy9FlB0MODA

Would it be possible to add the links to my variations? The original thread stated to pick one piece to arrange, but it doesn't say we can't arrange more than one version. XD
I don't expect the variations to be thoroughly analysed by the judges, but I just thought it would be more complete for other members viewing the thread.

Back to topic, I like alpiso's arrangement best, and it probably fits your scoring criteria quite well too (as opposed to mine, which was made using my own critera, which is very different. :heh: I purposefully omitted some detailed notations to give the performer greater flexibility in interpreting and expressing the piece).

Oh! A scoring thread ^.^ I though the scoring would be done only by the judges :lol:

Also, this thread should be "sticky", no ?


Well, I'll take my time to add my comment (as complete as possible) on each contestant. Just for now, thank to hinamuffin, sperion, for their feelings about my work ^_^

Please check your pm, KaitouKudou. :)

By the way, the thread title is misspelled..

Your webste isn't loading Sperion. Must be a temporary server problem. Can you upload it on Ichigos

Hmm, I can download all file of sperion right now.

Here are links from my backup website if you can't access my main website:
My arrangement of "tachiagare! ikari yo":
http://www.srcf.ucam.org/~pcfc2/score/tachiagareikariyo.pdf
http://www.srcf.ucam.org/~pcfc2/score/tachiagareikariyo.mid
http://www.srcf.ucam.org/~pcfc2/tachiagareikariyo.mp3

And some short variations, if you are interested in something sounding different: (I recommend 1, 3, 7 XD)
http://www.srcf.ucam.org/~pcfc2/score/tachiagareikariyo_var.pdf
http://www.srcf.ucam.org/~pcfc2/score/tachiagareikariyo_var.mid
http://www.srcf.ucam.org/~pcfc2/score/tachiagareikariyo_var2.pdf
http://www.srcf.ucam.org/~pcfc2/score/tachiagareikariyo_var2.mid
http://www.srcf.ucam.org/~pcfc2/score/tachiagareikariyo_var3.pdf
http://www.srcf.ucam.org/~pcfc2/score/tachiagareikariyo_var3.mid
http://www.srcf.ucam.org/~pcfc2/score/tachiagareikariyo_var4.pdf
http://www.srcf.ucam.org/~pcfc2/score/tachiagareikariyo_var4.mid
http://www.srcf.ucam.org/~pcfc2/score/tachiagareikariyo_var5.pdf
http://www.srcf.ucam.org/~pcfc2/score/tachiagareikariyo_var5.mid
http://www.srcf.ucam.org/~pcfc2/score/tachiagareikariyo_var6.pdf
http://www.srcf.ucam.org/~pcfc2/score/tachiagareikariyo_var6.mid
http://www.srcf.ucam.org/~pcfc2/score/tachiagareikariyo_var7.pdf
http://www.srcf.ucam.org/~pcfc2/score/tachiagareikariyo_var7.mid
http://www.srcf.ucam.org/~pcfc2/score/tachiagareikariyo_var8.pdf
http://www.srcf.ucam.org/~pcfc2/score/tachiagareikariyo_var8.mid

Please let me know if there are any problems with the links.


Although I am calling the earliest and longest arrangement the "main" one, which I most want the judges to comment on, I like some of the variations better, especially variations 1 and 7. (Variation 1 is easy to play but 7 is very difficult though...)

Hello everyone, I was away on the weekend there, which is why why I wanted to close it before the weekend as well. Thanks for the link correction!

Gotank has asked me if he could still submit his entry to the competition. His entry was completed a few hours after the competition thread had been closed and did contact me right after but I have not been available so I did not see it till now. If no other contestants mind this, I wouldn't have a problem with it either as this is a for fun event.

Can one of the moderators change this thread to a sticky and unstick the other one.

Thanks,
KK

Looking forward to Gotank's arrangement. ^_^

I would appreciate it as well if Gotank could joint the contest :).

Yes, yes !

I agree to have the submission of Gotank contest with the others !

Since no one seems to have anything against the idea, Gotank's arrangements have been added to the entries list. Everyone may view it via the first post;)

Yay, thanks for letting me enter! :)

Might post thoughts here later.

@Gotank: 怒り should be read as ikari rather than okori. A lot of websites are wrong with this song title, probably because one of the earliest transliterated tracklists made this mistake. :(

Anyway, the arrangement is very good! Sounds like it could have come from the soundtrack itself. In my opinion, it takes much more thoughts to arrange a piece this way and sounding good than the faster or more "structured"/"standard" (can't think of a better word) arrangements (like mine and most of my variations). Although I would prefer slightly different notation for note durations, groupings and ties that would make it easier to read for me, this arrangement has become my favourite out of all the entries (including mine).

My quick thoughts on the other entries, since I didn't really comment on any yet.



Sperion - Your arrangement is very creative! From simple arpeggios in the base to 8ths against triplets to everything else, you have a lot of pleasant variations. The transition at m60-62 is a really fascinating way to bridge the two loosely related passages. The trill at 55 is a nice idea to capture the "high flying' feel the horn in the original music gave. Your arrangements all seem to be incredibly accurate, and this one is no exception. The piece as a whole sounds very nice.

I'm not sure if the variation at m83 (the last variation on the theme) is best placed there. I felt the m63 variation might have better served as a 'finale', especially with that great transition leading up to it. Otherwise there is an appreciable increase in complexity and intensity as the arrangement progressed.


Hinamuffin - The piece captures the original dramatic mood very well. I like the flexibility in allowing the bass to carry the melody at times. There aren't any noticeably unpleasant progressions (chord or melodically), which is amazingly impressive if this is indeed your first serious attempt at transcribing. I feel the midi really doesn't do the arrangement justice, and that in the hands of an experienced pianist, this work can probably sound quite fantastic.

There are lots of arpeggios in this piece. One thing I've noticed in other piano pieces is that this style of harmonization with arpeggios often sound a tad better when one adds some tasteful non chord tones on occasion. Be careful about writing too many notes in piano's lower registers (especially repeated notes below the staff), as I imagine that can come off as overbearing in performance, and drown out everything else. Since I'm not a pianist, I can't really comment on the difficulty of the piece.


DunNotCome - You definitely have the most harmonically diverse arrangement of the entries. Most of the deviations are fairly nice actually, especially in the last version (or maybe I've just gotten used to them, haha). The passage beginning at m40 seems like it could be very peaceful and beautiful when played with proper expression. The score looks very complete.

Like I said with Hinamuffin, I think purely arpeggiating sequences can use some NCTs on occasion, or it risks sounding a bit predictable. While I'm not a pianist, I feel that ending at m80 with fortissimo and sustain pedal will almost certainly give a big blob of sound at the end of it when performed.


Alpsio - I like the simplicity of the piece. It doesn't try to overwhelm or do too much, but still remaining pleasant to listen to and builds continuously towards the end. Most of the chord choices are very faithful to the original recording (your use of DMaj at bar 13 is definitely called for I think, given the mood that section of the piece establishes). The approach to the transition at around m39 bridges the two foreign keys very well harmonically. The piece also seems very playable.

The Bb major 7 chord at m47 is interesting, though I'm not sure if that was intended, as I somewhat expected the A to resolve to a G in the coming measure but did not hear it; though that might be a stylistic preference. I feel the bass line is a tad 'heavy-handed' towards the end. While the staccato pattern does well in establishing a sense of finality, it can become predictable - though the variations in the treble distracts listeners from that most of the times. Aside from that, I didn't notice anything jarring. Good job. :)



Edit: @ Sperion - Haha, I didn't know about the misromanization. But I think it's a tad late now, as I've used that version of the name everywhere. And thank you for those flattering words, but I think there's merit to both styles of arrangement. A big flaw of my arrangement is that it lacks connectivity between the three main passages. As for the score, I have no idea what pianists prefer - very few people actually tell me anything about my sheets unfortunately.

Gotank, thanks for your comments. As you have figured out from all my transcriptions over the years, I like to keep the original impression and note accuracy (probably excessive to most people) as much as possible. Indeed I couldn't quite decide on which section to use as a finale. I kind of wanted a peaceful code, so I went with that in the end. Or perhaps, the real finale should be this: Variation VII http://www.srcf.ucam.org/~pcfc2/score/tachiagareikariyo_var7.mid XD

By the way, some of the note spacing look a bit odd in your score... is it a problem of the software you used? As for the notation I mentioned, in general I would use a tie if a shorter-than-minim-duration note crosses the third beat. To me, that makes it easier to see the rhythm. (A bit of nitpicking: I would decrease the bar number by 1. :P)

Gotank, thanks for the comments. A few things to note is that i used classical devises in the transcription to make it sound more virtuostic. The form i used is similar to a sonata form, as there is a recapitulation of the original theme at the end (Can find in Wiki), and that the arpeggios are in fact from Beethoven's Appassionata 3rd movement. I understand that the other entries used a compound 12/8 time for the piece, but i chose to use a 4/4 time instead as it would sound more quick, the ending is a variation of Beethoven's Moonlight Sonata 3rd movement, and the accompaniment to the tune in the Bb Minor measures are in fact from Bach's Prelude (no.1??). The given piece seem to fit synonymously to a classical form (Monotone melody, coupled with accompaniment, with key signature change to make it sound more 'epic'), so i figured classical devises can make it sound better, but thats my view of course, it varies for different people.

Good job for the competition! Wish you all the best for the scoring and judging. :-)

I might post my comments on everyone's submission, if i haf the time. thanks btw.

Omg Gotank thank you so much for your comment, it was very helpful! Im really happy you think its dramatic, cause I kind of tried to make it as dramatic as possible ;D this means i succeeded so yeah~

lols when will the results be posted?

My comments after listening and analysing other entries (I didn't want to listen or even look at it b4 the deadline to avoid copying of thematic materials)

Sperion:
Overall, the piece sounds great, with the appropriate variation of the main theme of the piece. I notice u didnt follow the actual key signature at the start, but rather did it in a C major scale, which is actually a E minor scale. A few chordal errors though (there are slight dissonance in certain passages). Be careful of overusing arpegiations, as arpegiations means to hold the notes down, when sometimes its just progression (Grace notes) rather than arpegiation. Be careful of switching from a 4/4 time to 12/8 triplets, as the passage might not link well due to the pacing of the music.
M20-21 doesn't seem to link very well as the 'epicness' of the previous phrase.
M35 - Chord error.
M55-56 - Be careful when inserting trills before resoluting the phrase, as the trills may overpower the resolution of the passage.
M60 - The passage does not link very well with the triplet, its a bit sudden for the triplet to appear in a melodic line.
M63 - Chopin Revolutionary etude???
The last phrases sounds great.

Gotank:
I don't really have much comments for yours and that the piece sounded peaceful and melodic. Be careful when using a lot of lower register notes, i understand that you are using a impressionist style of transcription (HIGH-5! I use that style for my transcriptions too, but not on this one), so using the lower register notes is only to emphasize the resolutions and feeling of the piece. Try to invoke a more impressionistic feel by using the high and low registers together. Some notational presentations issues though, the dotted quavers are not to be paired in whatever circumstances, and every note should be beamed on beat.

Hinamuffin:
Generally the piece is alright. Be careful of letting the piece sound too simple, or too predictable. There is a lack of variation on the arrangement. This may be due to the lack of experience, so u might want to relook into your transcribing methods and you might want to listen to more transcriptions to figure out more transcribing devices used.

I can't seem to download alpiso's transcription, it just won't start, so didnt manage to listen to his transcription.

DunNotCome, thanks a lot for the detailed comments. It is definitely helpful to receive comments from a pianist with superior musical knowledge. I noticed a few of the problems you mentioned, but went ahead with those.
I intend the arpegiations to be held down as long as possible, but of course the performer may interpret them differently, playing them like grace notes. I have had advice from pianists with different interpretations on arpegiations. I think both work, producing a different sound, but perhaps that is the wonder of leaving some freedom for the performer.
Indeed I have difficulty linking some of the phrases/sections. I decided on something that sounds acceptable to me, but perhaps that is just me getting too used to listening to my own stuff. Definitely need to improve on that.
M35 - intentional...? I think it sounds ok, but maybe it is a "chord error". Good point.
Trills - absolutely! I didn't think much about this; I will bear this in mind.
M63 - lol. Didn't think about Chopin's etude at all when writing that. Interesting, now I see the similarity.

Perhaps I should also write briefly my thoughts on your arrangement (and apologies that I am not capable to give a technical analysis). Overall it is an excellent piece. The decision to scrap the compound time in the original is a valid one, making it more fast paced. In particular I like M64-75, which work really well after the peaceful middle section.
M35-36, M77-78 sound a bit strange to me, although I can't quite figure out what is wrong (please excuse my lacking musical knowledge). It might just be a personal preference of chords :P.
The linking notes from M63 to M64 may need a bit of work, but it is a minor point.
The final 5 bars are really appropriate to end the piece. Excellent use of your classical music repertoire!

Thank you for the comments. I try to be as expressive as possible in my arrangements, but there's still a great deal of creativity I hear in other works which I can't grasp or imitate yet. Some ideas I have are limited by the fact that I can't find a way to execute them in a pleasing way. Using the extreme registers of the piano more effectively is one of my long-time goals.

As for notation - this seems to be a common consensus, so I'll definitely pay more attention to it.

On a side note, I believe m35 in Sperion's arrangement is exactly as the original piece.

Wow DunNotCome. You sure have excellent musical prowess! I envy that lol. It'll put my own judging comments to shame :heh:. I'm not a music major though being self-taught (via online resources) and all so I'm more technical and objective. But the way you critique... this is not something one can simply obtain online; I still don't know what the art critic's secrets are when giving a review as art is very subjective! You probably had years of training, so I take it you're a music major? Tbh I thought everyone's arrangements were very good. Apparently there are some room for suggestions that I wouldn't have picked up myself.

The results will come sometime over the weekend. My semester started so progress slowed a bit on my part.

:blink:Yes, for sure, comments posted yet, are very precise. I'll try to be as efficient as possible with mine (i'm working on)


I can't seem to download alpiso's transcription, it just won't start, so didnt manage to listen to his transcription.

It's annoying -_-

When you click on the link, a window appear with a viewer, so you can view the document in the window. If you want to download the document, just click on the "download" button on the top-right corner of the window.

Actually, im just a science student cum pianist + band clarinetist who had 7 years on the piano, 5 years of informal training (no exams, just taught by friends and self-taught), and only last year then i started music theory and play Diploma LT ABRSM pieces.
Well actually, its just about being very sensitive to the tiny details of the music.

Thanks for the compliments.

eh actually, i cant even view the file or even download it, i clicked on the link but nothing happens.....

That's pretty impressive. Self-learning for 5 years before going into diploma pieces. By the way, please excuse my lack of knowledge about higher qualifications in music. What does LT stand for? What is Diploma LT ABRSM? (DipABRSM in teaching, for a guess? or maybe LRSM... T?)

eh actually, i cant even view the file or even download it, i clicked on the link but nothing happens.....

:cry:

If you can't access this link : www.box.net you won't be able to download my file -_-

So :lol:, as I see you're using the services of mediafire (meaning, you can access this site) I uploaded my files here:
PDF (http://www.mediafire.com/?tn4d58jkicldxii)
MP3 (http://www.mediafire.com/?oeb2z95zbryps9m)

Hope judges will agree with this :heh:

ok i just listened to Alpiso's version. Heres my comments:

Generally its catchy and pleasant to listen. Some improvements can be done to further improve the transcription as well.
I understand you are doing it in a manner of a dance (Waltz I think?), so it of utmost importance that you explicitly state the articulations that you want for the transcription.

M12-13 - Might want to remove the augmentation, it sounds wierd and does not link with the next phrase well.
M19 & 24 - You might want to find a cleaner chord its not a dominanth 7th chord and therefore dissonance should be kept to the minimum.
M28 - 1 bar rest suggested, as it will sound too abrupt if the phrase ends too suddenly.
M40 - As stated in M28, except that u might want to end in a tonic A major chord in 2nd inversion for the R.H. and in the root position in the L.H.
M47 - Wrong chord it should be D, Bb and F instead of D, A and F as the chord is a submediant VI chord instead of a subdominant chord.

Some notational problems such as the triple Fs. Fortissimo (ff) is already very loud already, to make a player go to fff is a bit overkill.
The starting states pianossimo (pp), which is extremely soft, but are you sure it is supposed to be so soft, according to what i compare with your MP3 its not really the case, and the phrase, shouldn't it be softer than the starting 4 bars?

Which application did you use for the mp3 anyway? I like the piano sample maybe can introduce to me the samples?
Oh ya be careful when rendering the mp3, as i heard quite a lot of clipping of sound (Audiophiles may know what this means), especially at the last few chords, which indicates that the program is at it's limit. You might want to turn down the master volume mixer of the program before rendering the mp3.

Good luck for the competition! I enjoyed everyone's transcription and the competition as well.
DunNotCome

I wouldn't go as far as saying any chords are "wrong" - bad choice of chord perhaps, but sometimes there are seemingly wrong chords which produce good sounds.

I thought alpiso's is a recording. (I can't remember if there was clipping or not, since I only listened to it with bad speakers.) If there is clipping, it is probably about setting the level of the mic, which can be hard if the dynamic range is wide...?


Edit: By the way, what is a submediant VI chord? I thought submediant = VI... apologies again for my lacking musical knowledge.

I wouldn't go as far as saying any chords are "wrong" - bad choice of chord perhaps, but sometimes there are seemingly wrong chords which produce good sounds.

I thought alpiso's is a recording. (I can't remember if there was clipping or not, since I only listened to it with bad speakers.) If there is clipping, it is probably about setting the level of the mic, which can be hard if the dynamic range is wide...?
Actually, it depends on what type of progression it is. In Alpiso's case its partially wrong as the progression is 5-6 and not 5-4, thats y the chord is wrong.

Well, i can tell from an actual recording vs a computer generated one, its not so obvious so just to clarify is it a recording or computer generated (Sibelius???)

Here is my answer :D


First, thanks to give all these critics. I find them very constructive even if some of them should be misunderstood by a simple listener which doesn't know the story :p

I thought my arrangement like a tango (creativity ;) ). If someone want to listen one good, it's there http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZgcqijaUxdg :)
That's why I change the chord progression and wanted a D major chord at m13 (and m27,m28) : because of the kind of the music, which use V-I pattern (and need it).
But, As I'm not a specialist perhaps my conduction is not efficient.

m28 : I had to write a "fermata" mark. Adding a measure of rest will last too long.
m48 : it's defenitively because of the kind of the music.

I misunderstand about m19 and m24... I'm following the chord progression of the original : Gm - Eb - Bb - Fsus4 - F (so : Im - VI - III - VIIsus4 - VII) if you can give more precisions, I'll appreciate :)

The measure 41 is a point I didn't really known how to manage. The real chord (compared to the original) is a Bb. Gotank noticed that it wasn't very welcome too....
Here, I have the Major 7th of the Bb key, so a natural A to give some creativity. Also, I must say that this is purely stylistic, its a will. However with your critics and with some time to think about that, this note should not be let here, it should solve to the Bb on the third beat.


The point where I agree at 100% is about the lack of my notation concerning the articulations. I should notice "like a tango" at the beginning of the piece, or put some more staccato marks.... Maybe some advertised pianist would recognize the accompaniement at the first sight and play it in this way (isn't it sperion :) ? )

For the dynamics, it's OK the pp at the beginning is not good, it's an error to write it. My MP3 doesn't play what is written in the score !

Concerning the MP3 : I worked as I usually did : With Cubase and my keyboard, a Prelude from Roland. For the precision, the sound I use is the N°3, UltimatGrand. The Midi File produced by Lilypond doesn't have all dynamics and ornaments. So I played it with cubase. At the end, I did a "compression" (hope the word is good) Else, you have to modify the volume knob while listening, it's annoying. As I'm still learning this function, I agree it's not perfect. So clipping is not at recording, it's on editing ;)


Now, my feelings about the others works :)


DunNotCome : The orientation of the arrangement is clear. It's a "classical" piece. The style remains me "The Well-Tempered Clavier", especially the Prelude N°2 (C minor, BWV 847) about the accompaniment. It's really a Bach's touch :)
The arrangement follow the original song in its development. Each part remains at its place. The big surprise is the choice of the rhythmic which is about 16ths compared to the original that run with triplets.
I felt the transition from the 1st part to the 2nd (m39-m40) too abrupt. As you did an half note on the third beat (R.H.), a (complete) chord (L.H. & R.H.) should be welcome, with "laissez vibrer". Thus the accompaniment of the second part sounds bared compared to the other. (In fact, I'm afraid because when I hear your arrangement my thought is :" wow, great classical piece, but where I breathe? " :unsure: )
The AbMaj7 chord at m41 is surprising because of the G natural note that is away from the chord. A contrario, the F# at m12 and m71 sounds perfect, bringing some special chills :)
About the notation, I noticed at m6 that the voices crosses each one. Maybe it's a forgetfulness because it's correct at m65
Concerning the playability, at first sight, it seems technical. But, as usually students learn Bach's work at 3-4 years of course, I think that a motivated player should learn it well with regular work.


Sperion : I can say that you know what is the meaning of "Creativity" :D

The piece you give for the competition should be a "reduction" of the original. I mean you took all the important parts of the accompaniment and melodies to put them into a simple piano score.


The progression is good: Triplets from the beginning, with an intro which grab the attention of the listener, to the second part. Then a good transition that bring a rythmic with 16ths.
However the song should end at m82. Doing another variation starting at m83 is interesting, with the 8ths, but as the listener hear a final chord (that is well conduced) at m82, he is excepting a real ending, no ? However, if the real ending is from m99 it should be interesting to make a direct transition instead of repeating the theme again !?
I won't say things about the notation, as you already know it :p
Just an advice (if i can): at m5 and m7, it should be interesting to invert the stem ;)

Your piece is well playable in a whole way. From m39 to m45: 8ths with triplets need some work to play them properly (In fact, I don't like to play rhythmic like this :P )


Hinamuffin : The choice about your accompaniment is interesting: keeping the triplets then going on 16ths (It remind me some "Top Gear" (the game) tracks ^^). What is great with the last part is that the pattern remains the same, making it easier to play.
However, I feel you were looking for something with your "extra-intro" (from m5 to m12). I mean that the theme is really clear after m12. Unlike others, you start playing the theme at upper notes then go on lowers on a second part :)
Concerning the notation there's no dynamics indications and the piece should gain in visibility by spacing more your staves (m22) and by rewriting some part (Clefs' change, etc...) on the third part (from m56).
Be careful to the part from m23 to m30 will be arranged by players; pretty hard to extend the hand more than an octave (mine is at the limit); the upper note will note last.

Gotank : I must say it's my favourite. I (this is subjective!!) call this a real arrangement.
What is fantastic : the piece is already in a minor mode, but you turned it in a "sad song" very well, I mean dramatic. It's not even epic, it's dramatic: it could be used for a dramatic passage on the anime. The chord progression, the harmonization, very well moreover that you putted away introduction. The only bad point, in my opinion, are the graces notes. They are not needed at this point, or putting less of them.
And as the notation is very well done too, even if The MP3 provided give some rallantendo, and "a tempo" not noticed in the score, it's an easy and pleasant piece to play, even the triplets at m49.



Fffiuu. A long post, sorry for this. Hope there is no misunderstand. Don't hesitate.


The thing I remains about this contest is the creativity that which one can have about the same song. It's quite philosophic : people looking at the same mountain, each one from his home, describing it in different way, but speaking about the same thing ^_^

Good comments, alpiso. ^_^

Yeah, telling the performer about the tango style at the beginning would work, or putting in staccatos for those who don't want to think too hard before playing the piece (and for maximum clarity I suppose you could have different degrees of staccatos XD). Not sure if I have mentioned already, I appreciate your choices of harmony. ^_^ I take the A natural at m47 as an emphasised dissonance that the piece is still moving ahead, which it is.

For my arrangement, indeed m82 was originally an end, but I wasn't satisfied with the final chords, both arranging and performing. Needed a bit of a wind-down after the relatively hectic stuff in that section. :P I agree it can sound a bit clumsy with a repeat dragging on. The beams for the notes crossing the staves at m5,7 would probably look better in the middle. I like having 8th v triplets - influence from my favourite soundtracks.

(and for maximum clarity I suppose you could have different degrees of staccatos XD).

:lol::lol::lol:

About your final part, what do you think about to keep the accompaniment (with the 8ths) and put the melody of the "second part" above to go to your ending :think: ?

About your final part, what do you think about to keep the accompaniment (with the 8ths) and put the melody of the "second part" above to go to your ending :think: ?

I suppose that could be more interesting. Definitely something to try out when I next have time to play. I kind of wanted "peaceful" reminder to the main theme though. I also imagined a version where you jump from m82 to m99-end (skipping the 8ths accompaniment). That should keep the ending short and nice. Oh well, my indecisiveness again, and I encourage the performer to mix/rearrange/omit the sections according to the image he wants to produce. Or even mix in the other 7 (8? including the dancy one inspired by yours) variations I wrote. I tend not to stick to the scores when I play. :P

Thank you for the kind words, Alpiso.

About the 'a tempo' thing - I always thought that could simply be used to indicate return to the original tempo. But that turns out to not be the case, haha! I will also pay more attention to use of grace notes - sometimes I forget the stylistic implications of a passage when experimenting with things. I think that's something I will grow out of as I gain understanding of more arrangement techniques.

Edit: Just to clarify, I didn't dislike the Bb7 chord at in your arrangement, but that the lack of resolution of the A in the following passage was what I found odd. The chord itself with the dissonance is actually quite nice in my opinion.

M47 - Wrong chord it should be D, Bb and F instead of D, A and F as the chord is a submediant VI chord instead of a subdominant chord.


Just to clarify, I didn't dislike the Bb7 chord at in your arrangement, but that the lack of resolution of the A in the following passage was what I found odd. The chord itself with the dissonance is actually quite nice in my opinion.


Well actually, its just about being very sensitive to the tiny details of the music.

^_^ Dont worry, I'm not disappointed by the comments : as for DunNotCome who is looking for improvement on writing correct music, I'm working about well conducing voices in a SATB choir. And, this chord spot on this point : there are voices and they must be well conduced. So, my challenge is to manage both creativity and good writing :heh:. Also, with your 2 comments this is why, with some hindsight I said :


this note should not be let here, it should solve to the Bb on the third beat.


Again, I thanks both of you about your advices :)

thanks for the comments Alpiso. I found them quite constructive.
btw, y did u say u found the Ab Major chord at M41 surprising?? I saw the need for a picardy third and modulation to major scales b4 the next phrase, but i have troubles finding out why its strange.

And the notation for voices crossing each other is actually correct and deliberate. I did that to show players that the two voices are crossing each other, so that even if it reaches M65, the pianist will know that it crosses each other again, and apply the same fingering used at M6.

Thanks btw.

its so sad that ppl like us dun really get the attention that we deserve lols, its so hard to get views in youtube with just our transcriptions, we have to get very creative haha

Hey thanks everyone for their praises & critisism! <3
I really appreciate it. I'm reaaally happy you guys didn't say something like: "It sucks" or something XD (I actually prepared myself for something like that)
By the way: You guys are so... EDUCATED XD
I've got 5 years piano now I think?? No wonder that you guys are able to give such fantastic reviews. *sigh*

You guys: Yeah it was well constructed and the chords m22 m5 lalala
Me: Yeah... it's awesome

btw, y did u say u found the Ab Major chord at M41 surprising?? I saw the need for a picardy third and modulation to major scales b4 the next phrase, but i have troubles finding out why its strange.

Well, I found why it sound strange to me.... Sorry, but I won't explain with technical terms (such dominant, etc... ) even if I know them, I hope it will be more clear for everyone ;)

The second part is very particular, because we seems to hear a picardy third. I said "seems" because I have another analysis about this passage (that is perharps wrong), but for now we take this hypothesis.
I remember that a picardy third consist of going from minor to major directly on the last chord. If your song is in A minor, your last chord will be A major.

So here, for the picardy third, the chord progression is : VI - VII - I. With your tonality, we should have Gb - Ab - Bb. However, you did : Gb - AbM7 - F, so VI - VII - III, but as it's not the spotted point I won't discuss about it.

There is two things which surprised me. First it's the AbM7 with the natural G at the melody. Because with the chord progression, you have (Gb, Ab, Bb), introducing a natural G is going in contradiction with this chord progression. Second, this natural G is not the real melody from the original. The real notes are : Db - Gb - Db (upper) - C.
That's why it has been a surprise for me.
Don't know if I'm clear, but as it's about creativity, it's OK. I said what and why it surprised me, but this is not a dissonance that is absolutely wrong: it's a good dissonance, because it catch the attention of the listener, so you did your job (creativity!) ^.^

My own analysis about this second part is not to consider it as a picardy third. In fact I considerate another tonality. I'm considering I'm in Db major instead of Bb minor/major (keeping your tonality). In that case the chord progression become : IV - V - VII. Knowing that the VII is naturally a minor chord in a Db scale, here I consider it as a "borrowed" chord.
This is why I did a modification before the deadline. If you notice, I change my key signature.... :blink: err... :blink: oooops... :hey: I'm seeing I did a mistake on my score. It doesn't follow my thought.... at m29 I keep my key signature with two flat (the G minor become a Bb major), but the really meaning is that I wanted to be in a F major scale.... So it should be an only Bb flat.... at the key. In that case, the A chord at m40 is totally correct, because I did another change of tonality by using the dominant of D minor. As you notice, I use near scale to do my key change : Gm - Gm|Bb, Bb|F - Dm.

Well... It's done, so :sweat:


And the notation for voices crossing each other is actually correct and deliberate. I did that to show players that the two voices are crossing each other, so that even if it reaches M65, the pianist will know that it crosses each other again, and apply the same fingering used at M6.

I was also guessing something like this :)


By the way: we have all of us written a piece for a pianist, but nobody wrote fingers indications :D

Edit: @Hinamuffin, I did 4 years of piano. it was ... 15 years ago. since, I learned by myself with compositions, arrangements, something here and here. Music is a funny game where you try to do delicious mixture of notes ! And don't be afraid, everyone have to start one day. The best is to get constructive criticism. That's why we are here ^.^

Just to give you guys an update: We are still working on the comments for each work. The judges have been doing the best they can to get the results posted as soon as possible.

Hang in there guys^.^
KK

Many thanks for your effort. Take your time. ^_^

Yes, thanks for your work. Take time to do the best ^.^

take your time... hope to see your comments soon. Recently printed out everyone's version and sight read it, so shouldnt have a problem with playability (even with mine, i sight-read it perfectly), the problem may lie with notation, as different form of notation will give rise to different sight reading method.

Finished my part!
Also attached is hinamuffin's arrangement in mp3. I ran the midi from my piano and recorded it.

Here's the chord progression for anyone interested.
Marker 01 (Intro): E minor Em...

Marker 02 (first 2 phrases, main melody): G minor Gm, Gm, Eb, Bb, F, F, Eb, F

Marker 03 (second 2 phrases, main melody): Gm, Gm, Eb, Bb, F, F

Marker 04 (transition): Gm, Eb, F, Gm, Eb, F, Gm, Eb, F, Gm, Eb, F

Marker 05 (first 2 phrases, main melody): Bb minor Bbm, Bbm, Gb, Db, Ab, Ab, Gb, Ab

Marker 06 (second 2 phrases, main melody): Bbm, Bbm, Gb, Db, Ab, Ab, Bbm

Marker 07 (The calm part): Db Lydian Db, Eb, F, F-Bb*, F, F-Bb*, F, F, Db, Eb, Db, Eb, F...

Marker 08 (first 2 phrases, main melody): Bb minor Bbm, Bbm, Gb, Db, Ab, Ab, Gb, Ab

Marker 09 (second 2 phrases, main melody): Bbm, Bbm, Gb, Db, Ab, Ab, Bbm

*one chord plays half the measure

Great !




Marker 07 (The calm part): Db Lydian


Mmmh :\

I really need to study the modes...

I won't be home till later tonight to compile all the comments. The final results along with the comments will be posted on a separate results page once compilation of all the judges' comments are completed. Stay tuned;).

Finished my part!
Also attached is hinamuffin's arrangement in mp3. I ran the midi from my piano and recorded it.

Here's the chord progression for anyone interested.
Marker 01 (Intro): E minor Em...

Marker 02 (first 2 phrases, main melody): G minor Gm, Gm, Eb, Bb, F, F, Eb, F

Marker 03 (second 2 phrases, main melody): Gm, Gm, Eb, Bb, F, F

Marker 04 (transition): Gm, Eb, F, Gm, Eb, F, Gm, Eb, F, Gm, Eb, F

Marker 05 (first 2 phrases, main melody): Bb minor Bbm, Bbm, Gb, Db, Ab, Ab, Gb, Ab

Marker 06 (second 2 phrases, main melody): Bbm, Bbm, Gb, Db, Ab, Ab, Bbm

Marker 07 (The calm part): Db Lydian Db, Eb, F, F-Bb*, F, F-Bb*, F, F, Db, Eb, Db, Eb, F...

Marker 08 (first 2 phrases, main melody): Bb minor Bbm, Bbm, Gb, Db, Ab, Ab, Gb, Ab

Marker 09 (second 2 phrases, main melody): Bbm, Bbm, Gb, Db, Ab, Ab, Bbm

*one chord plays half the measure

Oh my, thanks for doing that! I was too lazy to export it in mp3 LOL XD