I know I said I was doing a Blinx one shot but I've abandoned that due to a change of plan. I think the blinx idea was just a idea fart I had and I tried to do something with it but I have no plot and the character is stale because it's not my character and I can't add new ideas to a character I love from something else. Today something wierd happened... I was outside on the porch and I got a huge explosion of ideas and part of an original manga plot to go with Nakol's dimension shifting abilities. When I came in the house, nothing... It was wierd, when I was outside I thought of characters and plots and stuff but when I walked inside all I was left with was may'be one idea. So I've discovered I'm extremely creative when I'm outside but in the house I'm a terrible writer. So I'll have to write down all my ideas and sketch outside then develop my ideas somehow. Anyway just wanted to let y'all know I'm continuing my original manga now :)

I don't like Nakol so I'm changing that and now the Manga is titled: "/Slide\"
I'll post a full summary once I get a chance :)

His name is now "Kajetan Noor, DV" Noor is his family name and DV is something called a subname which is like a special suffix used with a persons name many times will reveal where a person is from. (Dv is pronounced by individual letter "dee, vee") I don't think it's too hard to pronounce but in case your wondering: Kajetan is said almost how japanese would say it, Noor is said "No-ur" Kajetan is Polish, Noor is Arabic ^ ^ But in my made up world, Kajetan means "Open Door" Noor means "Reflection" So generally his family named him Kajetan Noor which means literally "The reflection of an open door" An open door in their culture represent promise and an opportunity. In his country usually people's names have a literal meaning with their first and last and have some significance but their are exception. -_-

i really like the idea of characters in the story having a literal meaning. Not just one... but everyone. I thought that was pretty neat. Now all you have to do is sit down and do it.... outside that is.

Ok so I have an actual plot now! This is just quickly written I didn't worry about format right now:



Basically, Kajetan is the raiyulket of spatial reality; Along time ago, God gave his chosen special people poweful abilities inorder to protect his creation and help keep evil away. Each chosen one was Gifted with a small mosel of God's power over a certain existance in his creation; They were known as raiyulket "God-breathed men" Unfortunately these people became arrogant having their special gifts and satan used this against God. They began thinking of themselves as God and wanted people to worship them as Gods themselves. Rough right now but I'm getting somewhere with it now at least :heh:

Very rough. Take some more time to polish this. Also, your choice of terms will make things be forgettable due to how obscure they are. Raiyulket doesn't even resolve in a search engine. If you made it up, it should be constructed as an extension of something that is a base component of the plot. If you didn't make it up, make sure it's a part of a core language and stick to using just that language throughout the story (having three or more languages built into a story is generally bad practice for those getting started).

And do take some time to learn how to properly order ideas and apply grammar to it. No matter how good your plot can become, if you don't know how to properly establish an exposition, rising action, climax, falling action, and resolution in a clear and concise way, the story will be illaudable.

Be careful with explaining too much also within your story; making characters and the plot explain things as if you were reading an encyclopedia is a cliche and novice faux pas. Accomplished and talented writers like Tolkien, Garth Nix, or even Orwell, tossed the audience to their strange universes and essentially expected everyone to keep up with what observations were given, and rarely having to say anything explicitly and factually because of the rich use of environmental detail (though supplemental text can be provided, it not reading it shouldn't hinder one's experience with the main text).

Doing a little research on how to create a literary universe effectively can't hurt anyone, like comparing and contrasting the literary techniques employed in Eragon versus The Lord of the Rings.

Be careful with explaining too much also within your story; making characters and the plot explain things as if you were reading an encyclopedia is a cliche and novice faux pas. Accomplished and talented writers like Tolkien, Garth Nix, or even Orwell, tossed the audience to their strange universes and essentially expected everyone to keep up with what observations were given, and rarely having to say anything explicitly and factually because of the rich use of environmental detail (though supplemental text can be provided, it not reading it shouldn't hinder one's experience with the main text).

Doing a little research on how to create a literary universe effectively can't hurt anyone, like comparing and contrasting the literary techniques employed in Eragon versus The Lord of the Rings.
This this this.

Raiyulket is a made up word meaning "God-breathed-man" It is a word that is part of the language they speak in the area he's from.

I said it was rough, I was just giving out a plot, I have to edit, revise before I'll a finished summary that is written well. About explaining things, I like to get technical with my characters explaining things but I'll try to be careful to do it now and then instead of everytime something happens. Bleach has this problem, the bad guys explain things while the hero sits around and listens to their babbling instead of catching them off guard, naruto as well. The whole, waiting you turn in battle has to be a very lame, unrealistic feel alot of shonen manga have.


Be careful with explaining too much also within your story; making characters and the plot explain things as if you were reading an encyclopedia is a cliche and novice faux pas. Accomplished and talented writers like Tolkien, Garth Nix, or even Orwell, tossed the audience to their strange universes and essentially expected everyone to keep up with what observations were given, and rarely having to say anything explicitly and factually because of the rich use of environmental detail (though supplemental text can be provided, it not reading it shouldn't hinder one's experience with the main text).


Yes, but remeber they're authors of books, this is a manga it's all pictures and dialogue. There's no describing with words involved, but there would be in the summary I guess. :sweat:


having three or more languages built into a story is generally bad practice for those getting started

True, but I feel it's unrealistic to have everyone speak the same language and names sound the same if they come from different countries. Everyone speaks japanese in naruto, it makes no sense



Thanks for the advice!

True, but I feel it's unrealistic to have everyone speak the same language and names sound the same if they come from different countries. Everyone speaks japanese in naruto, it makes no sense

The problem comes into play with expecting your reader to understand the words being said. Reading through Ulysses and Lolita was a pain for me since they switched between French and English a lot without a strong context. Even though both novels are well written, it can turn off an audience. Since you're writing this as a Graphic Novel, it's even more important since your target audience is going to be younger and less likely to understand the intricacies of the dialects and auxiliary language you use/create.

While you write by looking into yourself, you should also write looking outward to your audience and pick up the subtle context in which humans actually convey information. You'll quickly realize that you'd have to write explanations about everything, which is not what writing a Graphic Novel is, rather, it's a way to attack the core story without using thousands of words to describe a scenario. You paint the picture for the reader; you already said this. There isn't enough time or space to both craft and teach a whole language in a Graphic Novel as opposed to novellas and novels.

And this is precisely why there are so many anime and manga released today that are written purely in the targeted audience language. There are a few that cross over, but never beyond a 10% level, and that's due to a situational events in the plot rather than a core plot element.

I mean consider your original:


Kajetan is the raiyulket of spatial reality; Along time ago, God gave his chosen special people poweful abilities inorder to protect his creation and help keep evil away. Each chosen one was Gifted with a small mosel of God's power over a certain existance in his creation; They were known as raiyulket "God-breathed men" Unfortunately these people became arrogant having their special gifts and satan used this against God. They began thinking of themselves as God and wanted people to worship them as Gods themselves.

To a slightly revised copy:


A long time ago, God gave poweful abilities to a chosen few in order to protect his creation and help keep evil away. Each chosen one was given a gift from God. Within this gift was a small mosel of God's power over a certain essence exposed through his creation. The heirs of these powers were referred to as Jinn. Unfortunately, the Jinn became arrogant from possessing these special gifts. Satan used their sins against God, and guided the Jinn down the path of becoming a god. The Jinn began to draw people to worship them as gods themselves, causing God to be cast into the shadows they produced. Kajetan is a Jinn of Spacial Reality [insert-more-stuff-here-regarding-why-this-is-important-to-the-reader].

The point is a lot clearer, the focus of the plot's conflict is established, better grammar is used, and the name of the Raiyulket was changed to Jinn (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jinn) which provides hidden depth to your story, and the cleaner use of English makes the plot more memorable (though clichéd).

Don't be afraid to borrow from other resources, as they will save you both time and effort.

True, but I feel it's unrealistic to have everyone speak the same language and names sound the same if they come from different countries. Everyone speaks japanese in naruto, it makes no sense

I think everyone everyone in Naruto speaking the same language is the least of your worries if you are seeking realism...

I think everyone everyone in Naruto speaking the same language is the least of your worries if you are seeking realism...
+1
Besides, they're all ninja anyway...why wouldn't they all speak Japanese? Oo

+1
Besides, they're all ninja anyway...why wouldn't they all speak Japanese? Oo

Lol ^w^

I think a language is important if the setting is in the future... or in the past. A lot of the shows and movies with different language being used (such as an alien language) in the future of the past. If it's in the present... then we know to the certain degree what spanish sounds like, what french sounds like and da da da da da... you know. From what I understand.. the story of yours occurs in a distant world, so perhaps you can take what I said as a consideration.