I need some feedback. I'm planning to release a CD sometime in the future, so I need your opinions about my songs. Here's my first one:

Cindel's Theme - Simple Complexity
http://www2.hawaii.edu/~yagomich/compositi...ecomplexity.mid (http://www2.hawaii.edu/~yagomich/compositions/cindelstheme-simplecomplexity.mid)

1. Is it too short?
2. Is it not simple/complex enough?
3. Mistakes?

Comments are GREATLY appreciated. Mahalo! :D

May I ask who Cindel is? :D

Overall, it was great! I like the chord progression and how the right hand just jumps so freely from octave to octave. :) There's one thing I might suggest... although perhaps it's only because it's a MIDI: It sounds like at a few parts (the part where both hands are descending together) the notes are a little too "separated", almost like a subtle detache. Is that the effect you were going for? (I wish I could point the part out to you) Or is it just the MIDI? Either way, it doesn't matter much. Great song, it'd be great on your first CD! :D I'll buy it when it comes out! :)

I'd work on the themes. I'm having trouble remembering them, and I'm sure with you, it's no problem because you invented them, but you should elaborate on them to make it memorable. They have potential, but they're significantly underplayed. All of the great masterpieces have themes that you can easily remember and sing. Yeah, just work with a few themes and slide between them instead of trying to make it progress without a foundation. Unless you're going for a more ethereal, formless piece.

I'll buy it when it comes out!
I'll just steal it from the internet.

I don't really like the way the song introduces itself, it's good for a few seconds there, but it sounds weird sometimes...
You made a good theme, that comes here and there with some variations, and I liked the octave jumping. It also sounds professional, and with a character's touch. I didn't feel a significant character theme, however. Try making a more of a memorable theme that catches the listener's ear. Overall, I think it's good.

Rate: 7/10. ( 10 being perfect, and 7 being good )

Thanks for the feedback.

1. Cindel is my girlfriend.
2. On my CD, my songs will be actually played and recorded, but the "touch" will eventually come in.
3. The "empty" part is due to the absent thirds, and that was what I was going for. Because the next descending part had the full chords. But that whole part needs to be edited because of the parallel thirds and fifths.

I'm going to fix this while I'm gone for the next two weeks. Thanks! ^_^

Couple good uses of dissonance in that chord knot, don't get me wrong, it's perfect, leave it the way it is. Every song needs slight notes of confusion, great music.

I keep trying to "fix" this song, but to no avail. I'm trying to change the melody or the chord progression, but everytime I try to, the entire song changes and it doesn't sound right. Any suggestions?

On a side note, if I leave it as is, breaking basic music theory rules, it sounds unique yet simplistic.

If you release a CD, I'm definiteyl buying one.

Like all the other threads, I can't give any constructive criticism, because I'm not a composer.

The song is certainly evident of your style (why wouldn't it be? ^.^ ) It reminded me of Cherylin's theme.

btw: I still want the sheets for stacy's theme, but if you are releasing them commercially, I might not have that luxury lol :heh:

I love it :) so beautiful :) 10/10

Ok, I give up. I can't edit this song. It's too difficult to break...

Can you guys review this song next? I have to warn you, it's 6 minutes long.

Cindel's Theme -Trust (http://www2.hawaii.edu/~yagomich/compositions/cindelstheme-trust.mid)

Your first one to me was fairly bad in the beggining. I didn't like how it was. But then it got better and better and at the end it sounded very proffesional like. So.......7/10, good job!

Ok, I have a new one, and I hope you guys like it. This is the first time I've included percussion, so I hope it sounds ok.

Stacy's Theme - Everyday (Orchestral Reprise) [see below]

If you were on the old Ichigo's, you may have heard the piano solo for this song.

@ Stacy's Theme - Everyday

Great intro! Loved it. It had some rests that I wasn't prepared for though. I liked the violin (?) that takes the melody to a new level. Even better when the strings kick in. I didn't really like the bass-strings in the beginning. This part is good...but the following section is better ^.^ The brass section is superior in my opinion, and the drums are well layered. The climax in this song is definately when the drums kick in and the main melody at 2:30. I didn't like the strings around 2:50, but the piano-play that comes in there is very good! This song has some parts that could be made better, you know, as a 'sub-melody'. The bass-strings is annoying me somehow, but it gets alot better at 1:04.. The theme is also very memorable and nice, but I don't think it suits for a girl's theme song.. This sounds more like a "Freedom" theme or something like that, especially when the brass kick in with the drums.It kept my interest throughout the song and I was always waiting for the end. Not that I wanted it to end, but I was excited how you would put it. I guess you'd put a piano solo in, like you introduced the song, but you used strings too... I didn't like the end too much, but that's only my personal preferance. I'd love to hear a piano ending on this song.

---

+ Intro
+ Piano
+ Orchestration
+ Theme
- Ending
- Strings
- Name association

---

Overall - 82/100 - Very good

Someone who thinks like me! No one liked the piano ending when I made it. They said it was too predictable. Eck... :bleh:

Hm...I don't think you made a bad job it, just so you know.. 82/100 is the highest rating I've ever given to anyone here.

Funny. At this point, I have 39 downloads, but no one else but Noir7 has said anything...

Ireally liked cindel's theme. Espcially the first part where you have the melody repeated in the left hand playing underneath the continued melody. Ican't really say anything about Stacy's theme, it won't play for me.

Michael, all your pieces that you've written are amazing. there are some parts that you can fix, but that's just listening preference. I like stacy's theme, though i really dislike that violin sound... cause maybe it doesn't sound like the real thing which i like :huh: . that's listenin preference. I like how you end the song... ties everything up nicely. this kind of song however could have some lyrics with it because i keep hearing what i think is a chorus. So yeah, that'll be cool if you could add lyrics to it.

for cindel's theme, i don't really like the progression coming down i keep hearing the same sound at 00:25 and through out the song. it just doesn't sound right. and then there are these chords 00:49 it goes single notes then into a chord.... i would probably fix that maybe??? anyways, great song! bet your gf really like this, eh?

Cindel Rating- 8.0/10

Stacy Rating- 9.5/10

I really like Stacy's theme, nice piano intro - 10/10

all great! 10/10 plus********** 10 stars ! oh look people are throughing roses!
@-->-- @-->--- @--->-- @-->-- wow!

Just out of curiosity, what makes these songs 10/10 plus? Not to offend the composer, but I almost think you guys are. You are of course free to express your opinions about the songs, but if you ask me, your comments are as cheap as "Uh...I hate it" or "It sucks".

Now if you get comments like that, you should at least explain why you think you hate it, no? If you honestly give a 10/10 'plus' rating, I think you owe the composer a very good explanation too. But that's just me.





;_;

okok well do you think I can play THAT good im not the one becomeing the next bhentoven!

Originally posted by Noir7@Jul 21 2004, 03:57 PM
Just out of curiosity, what makes these songs 10/10 plus? Not to offend the composer, but I almost think you guys are. You are of course free to express your opinions about the songs, but if you ask me, your comments are as cheap as "Uh...I hate it" or "It sucks".

Now if you get comments like that, you should at least explain why you think you hate it, no? If you honestly give a 10/10 'plus' rating, I think you owe the composer a very good explanation too. But that's just me.





;_;
Ugh >.< If you would actually read my post, then you could answer my question. I don&#39;t care if you&#39;re the becoming &#39;bhentoven&#39; or not, since I don&#39;t see how this comment has to do with this in the first place...

So far, I had listened to both Cindel&#39;s Theme. The first one, was a little dull at the beginning but I do get that you are trying to bring out the feelings of complex. It&#39;s a great try, though. And when the left hand accompaniment comes in, the song got more interesting and what I like the most is you still keep the feeling of complexity there. I think that song is really wonderful.

As for the theme Trust, the beginning wasn&#39;t nice to me. :sweatdrop: However, as it moves on, it gets really nice. The length of 6 minutes is not very long to me. The mood of the music in the middle section does shows a trust of someone and I like the change of mood about towards the end there. Both compositions are very nice. **thumbs up**

I didn&#39;t get to listen to Stacy&#39;s theme, it won&#39;t load. But I had saved it into my computer, I&#39;ll write my comments next time.

Sorry if I offends you or anything.

Don&#39;t worry about me being offended. Any criticism is good, since I rarely get any offline.

It won&#39;t load? Hurm... maybe I exceeded bandwith? Let me look for another host...

Okay, I had listened to Stacy&#39;s Theme and jot down a few comments. So here it is.

I love the piano playing in the piece especially the intro. The beginning is a nice start. The bringing in of violin as the accompaniment is nice and suitable for this piece. I wonder what&#39;s the instrument for the main melody? Is it flute? Later in the piece I like the idea of bringing along the beats (I think it&#39;s drum?). At the first part it came in, it fits nicely together with the piano. Then, the rest just flows on nicely. I think this is a great piece. :)

ummm all 3 whir good .. 6/10 just my oppion they whir i bit over done i like simple music like hokages funeral (naruto) that are easy enough for almost anyone to play and such but sound great. Another exmple is Change the world-Inuyasha. Your music sounded a bit more classical. X_X -_- :unsure: <_< :heh: :ph34r: :D well good job ^_^

EDIT- that stacy song or whatever was 10/10 the other two is what i meant above.

Wow... been a while since I&#39;ve been here. :mellow:

Here&#39;s a new song I wrote. I hope you guys like it.

Bethany&#39;s Theme - Smile For Me (http://www2.hawaii.edu/~yagomich/compositions/bethanystheme-smileforme.mid)

Hm, I don&#39;t liked the intro of this one. I usually like your intros, but this one was just too slow and uninteresting. At 1:25 some interesting parts came though, and they were pretty good. But the < 1:25 parts could&#39;ve be done much better, especially by you. A good thing is how the song actually fits its name very well. I can easily imagine someone smiling, and I hear a bit of love that has been thrown into it also. At 3:47 another good part shows up, and the same with 4:00>. Ending was okay, but... never mind, it was good.

So.. overall this is a pretty good song, while not your best. Correct me if I&#39;m wrong, but you try to compose music that bases and reflects your real life, right? I think you do that great, but you should try to develop different kinds of styles. Your songs are just too predictable sometimes. Melody solo there, that thing comes in there...

7/10 - Good&#33;

@smile for me
nice and powerful theme&#33;
you have done a good job in slowly increasing its strength. The climax is awesome. I am actually emotionally "lifted" during the climax.

the only draw back I think is that there&#39;re some awkwardness when you throw in some short-highpitch-transition melodies like the ones in 3:04, 3:24, 4:10, 4:31 (> 4:34 is fine)
I remembered you had used similar technique in your other pieces, but somehow I feel that it doesn&#39;t work in this one.

Hmm... well, this is the first song that I (knowingly) worked with chords +4 and +9. Thanks for the input, let me see if I can alter it a bit...

Great job as usual ^^

I&#39;ve said this before, but your style is very unique and recognizable . . it&#39;s interesting how you&#39;re able to maintain that in all your songs, heh. I was just wondering why you start all (most?) of your songs with an unaccompanied melody . . cause it sounds much better to me once you get the left hand in with the chords. I&#39;m not too fond though of the overuse of those quick upper-register flourishes, but that&#39;s just me =P

This song has a really nice flow, and it&#39;s easy to follow along . . I especially like that. As everybody else has said, you can feel the emotion. You&#39;ve mastered your midi program to get the dynamics and timing right, so that especially helps. This song feels more like a love song than your previous one, so you should have submitted this one&#33; Then again, you just completed it, heh . . .

Nice song, michael.

Though the Intro is a little &#39;empty&#39; but as the accompaniment of the left hand comes in, it sounds very melodious. :D I love how the melody flows especially when it reaches the climax. I love the chorus most and the usage of the left hand accompaniment. Even though it&#39;s just a midi but I found it well expressed with the dynamics. I wonder would you play and record it as MP3 format?

Is it okay for me to have the scores? Anyway, it&#39;s a good composition. And I agree with Al, your compositions do have your very own style which is recognisable ~

Cheers ~

Ok I have a new one. Listen to it while I finish the reviews for the Christmas Contest. :D

Emily&#39;s Theme - Thoughts Of You

It was a very slow start - I think I prefered the fast section much more as the beginning... it was kind of as if you were waiting for something to come in any minute and it didn&#39;t, it just kept going on till the fast section - perhaps introduce another instrument or some sort of new thing after a little while before leading into the uptempo passage?

Hey, I like it :) The beginning kinda reminds me of a sad anime scene ^^

Ah, theme and variations ^^ For the intro, I liked how you snuck in the second voice . . really nice harmonies and a gentle melody. In the faster section, I was impressed with how the theme stood out despite everything going on. Must be fun to perform, eh?

Another nice composition from you. I really like most of your compositions. XD Well, I really bad at commenting so I will not comment. :heh: Just wanna let you know it&#39;s a nice song. ^^ Hope you will compose more songs soon. :D

My last song for a long time... (maybe)

Kathryn&#39;s Theme - A Path Of Yellow Leaves
Link: http://michaelyago.vanadielcrusade.com/com...ellowleaves.mid (http://michaelyago.vanadielcrusade.com/compositions/kathrynstheme-apathofyellowleaves.mid)

Stacy&#39;s Theme - Everyday:

at the start IMO it didnt sound as too great so i was expecting it to go in the same manner throughout. i was starting to wonder what kind of taste noir7 had :P. but later on the melody picked up really well, i mean god damn&#33; its good. and so all in all the beginning of the song makes perfect sense now

my feelings on the song: it sounds like the perfect one as a game ending song. not to be interpreted as an insult, hey there are alot of great game endings take any RPG game, well almost though. the reason why i because the song gradually builds up, as it progresses it becomes more, shall we complex, more instruments are playing and on.

its one of the best ive heard so far.

I like stacy&#39;s theme Its a relly nice song :lol:

Thanks. ^^

(What about my latest song...?)

With midi, it&#39;s sometimes difficult to hear the main melody over all the voicing parts, such as in this latest piano solo, but despite everything going on, you pull it off quite well.

Hey, I just noticed that &#39;a path of ..." almost looks like "apathy of ..." ???

Your tendency to start off the piece with a simple statement of one of the main themes is not overused, in my opinion. Each time you&#39;ve done that is different, and each time you&#39;ve improved. It&#39;s the same thing with how you end off the piece, that is, with the simple restatement of the theme. It ties everything together after all. However, I suggest that since you&#39;ve mastered this model, you could perhaps experiment with something new?

There&#39;s one chord I recognized that you used in many of your other pieces. Just thought I&#39;d point that out, because it&#39;s unique to your songs, haha.

I like those dramatic parts where you build up the tension and everything, and then cut off abrupty. But maybe you could give us a longer pause afterwards to absorb the flow?

For your very last chord, could you make it into an arpeggio too, almost like the preceding chord? I feel that it&#39;d be less abrupt, and it&#39;d make for a nicer flourish.

Originally posted by Al@May 6 2005, 12:32 AM
There&#39;s one chord I recognized that you used in many of your other pieces. Just thought I&#39;d point that out, because it&#39;s unique to your songs, haha.
Which chord? o.O

@smile for you. - I see what you&#39;re doing. It&#39;s a great idea though I don&#39;t think anyone notices it. It&#39;s effective but don&#39;t overdo it. The only criticism I have is that the main tune repeats a bit too much for me. If you vary it a bit whilst your using your idea then it&#39;ll work fab&#33; nice chord patterns. score 8/10

p.m. me if you don&#39;t understand what the heck i&#39;m on about. :heh:

I liked emily&#39;s theme. Nothing wrong with it i think. I like the way you make it emotional. That&#39;s something I rarely hear here.

Now that I&#39;ve listened to staceys song, you seem to have a knack for using the same sort of ending cadences as me, but your style is pretty unique here. You&#39;re a really good composer. Fits the fact that you&#39;re the main music mod. ^_^

hee, i thought i&#39;d post for once...

i think "a path of yellow leaves" is wonderful. like everyone else here says, you are an amazing writer. i give "a path of yellow leaves" an 8/10.

although i love the latest one, i&#39;ve had an affinity to "trust"... :huh: i dont know... i like "trust" because it starts off as a slow sad peice and ends up turning cute and happy... but still has the bitterness at the end... ^_^

just thought i&#39;d put my 2 cents in lol ^_^

I wonder if anyone remembers me...

But anyway...

Mary's Theme - When I Look Into Your Eyes (http://www.themaikeru.com/v1/music/michaelyago-whenilookintoyoureyes.mid)

OF COURSE! Man, I missed you here in the composition forum, your piano solos have always been one of my favorites ("Smile for me"!) :D I'll comment on the song tomorrow it's 00:27 am now and I'm in a really bad mood...

I like it, it's beautiful, the notes are well put, but the thing I dislike a little is the little pauses between notes, lol I don't know how to say this in english but I hope you understand me. I very beautiful though you did an amazing peice.

I remember you! Lol. Though it was when I was a lurker of this forum... So that's like 2 years ago! XD

~~~

The piece generally was well done; everything was clean and crisp. But it's cos it's too clean and crisp that there weren't anything that gives tension or feeling of unease, so that was a little bit disappointing. But good job nonetheless.

I kinda put it together in the span of 4 crazy hours at 1AM in the morning. I had to make it easy enough for me to play it that afternoon as well, so I didn't really make it too fancy. ^^;

That's a really cool piece there. ^_^ A little cliche, but nonetheless, beautiful. Although I agree with Sir. Great job on that.

And I believe I do remember hearing you mentioned at some time by Noir7... a long time ago... Hmmm...

MICHAEL YOU'RE BACK

I hate to sound like a bastard but that song got real boring for me. I think you should have just ended it a lot earlier. I'm not saying that it was boring because it was simple, it's just that I was looking for a bigger contrast and it just never happened.

For a four-hour piece, not too bad, but if you're looking to improve it, you do need a contrasting section in there, and I don't just mean new melody/motives, but maybe a change of key, or there were a couple places where my ears just wanted it to move into a really tense, minor sections, right before the middle point of the song.

BTW, from what I hear you're somewhat of the "prodigal" user. Welcome back. If you can sometime, provide a recording.