ok...i need some advice. Now i know that this might be a stupid thread to post and it might already be a thread but i really need help with this...during the last few years ive been "crushing" so to speak on this one girl...and i told her i like her tons of times and still she said i dont think of u like that....and at the begining of me liking her this made me feel bad...but now...2 years l8r after we have became so much closer...i cannot stop thinking about her...all i can talk about is her...i really like her alot...i have so much fun with her...and the only time im happy is when im near her and shes not clinching on some1 else..ive told her so many times how i feel but nothing works...im depressed over one girl..i need tips....ive tried tons of stuff to get over her...like writing a list of what i dont like about her...that worked for alitle bit until i saw her the next day...ive tried saying to myself.."nothings ever going to happen i dont like her anymore" basicly i dont know what to do can u guys help me?



EDIT: since im over the girl i like im making this thread a thread to help other ppl too...if u need advice on how to get over any1 just post and we might be able to help u,....

Well, first of all, don't try to destroy those feelings! I know it hurts because she doesn't feel the same way, but it's really unhealthy to try to (for lack of a better word) "unlike" her.

Secondly, I think perhaps you should give her a little more space. It sounds like you're coming on a bit desperate, which isn't an attractive quality. If you avert your attention from her a little, and spend less time with her, she might, might realize that there might be some feelings, however small, after all. Believe me, things seem a lot more appealing when you don't have them. If she has grown attached to you in a sense, something may happen. I'm not saying this for sure, but I think that's the best plan of action.

And if that doesn't work, I don't know what to tell you. Maybe it wasn't meant to be. You'll get over her eventually. Time heals all wounds, after all.

thx alot man....ill think about that....any1 else have some stuff that could mabye help me too?

I don't want to sound harsh but I'm going to tell it like I think I see it. She's crippled you and has become your crutch when it comes to being happy. She practically is your happiness fix. You don't have to stop being her friend though, just find other things to make you happy. Other stuff will balance out the dependence you feel for her, the weight of desire will no longer be pinpointed to this one girl, and you will find that she's still a good friend but not your world.

thats why i never love =]

and how come its never 'how to get over a guy?'

its always how to get over a girl...

DiamondSeraph: dont wory that wasnt harsh...i realize what u mean...and i know i have to find another way to be happy...i just havent found that yet and its realy hard to find right now....

Ashtr: i have no idea...mabyeguys really have trouble getting over girls..then girls do getin over guys? but i dont know....and trust me u will love some1 its almost impossible to stop....

thx every1 i stil need more help though....you who have helped so far are awesome...

thats why i never love =]

and how come its never 'how to get over a guy?'

its always how to get over a girl...
Gotta agree witcha. There are more girls being played by guys but there's never a "How To Get Over A Guy." Probably because girls who are not too emotional just cry it out then looks for someone better.

@ badgerblue: Hmmm....well, in your case I'd say, try to stop thinking about her. Try making yourself busy with activities that really needs thinking. That might help.

I just have a question. Do you love her or like her? Cuz if you love her, my opinion would be different.

i....sorta love her...i guess...i mean ive liked her for 2 years...and my feelings have only gone up since then...if i dont love her its a really huge crush ....

Are you a man, badgerglue?

ARE YOU A MAN?

Actually, I was only asking to establish . . . er, legality. Yeah. If you are a man, by legal definition, than I would offer you the ONE GOLDEN ADVICE:

(please do not view the spoiler if you are not legally an adult, kids)*

GFTOWGo fuck ten other women. No, NOT PROSTITUTES. WOMEN. If she's *STILL* so special after those ten woman . . . well, maybe she does have something worth your while. But chances are . . .

If you are not legally an adult, I suggest that you become very VERY interested in something else. Say, become a D&D nerd/ anime fanboy /etc. Take your mind off her.

*Who am I kidding?

i dont think u can be any meaner dark bring....and guess what im only 16 ok?

That reminds me of when I was a stupid and immature youngling and I liked this girl for 3 years (in elementary)... XD

Now, I don't give a rat's ass about her...

But in your case, you're close to her, so... I don't know. I guess go for it if you're that obssessed (although I strongly oppose all obsessions except for music :P ).

EDIT: Dark Bring's post is also fairly good advice, btw. ;)

i....sorta love her...i guess...i mean ive liked her for 2 years...and my feelings have only gone up since then...if i dont love her its a really huge crush ....
*sighs* I kinda hate it when people don't even know what they're feeling.

Hmmm...well, if it's just a huge crush, you'll either get over it soon or you'll grow to love her.

I mean like it's been 2 years already and that's when your feelings kinda get mixed up and you don't even know what you're feeling. That's what happened to me. But I soon realized that I just had a major crush on him.

Ok, back on topic. If you love her, all I can tell you is that you need to be patient. You need to show her that you actually love her and not just tell her. Just telling her won't do anything. Ever heard the song "More Than Words"?

nope ive never heard that song...and mabye ur right...mabye i do need to just show her how i feel not tell her...and yes i decided i do love her...

Edit: first of all im not legally and adult...and second of all he seems like hes making fun of me.....

Hope it helps you with your problem. Seriously, I know nothing about this stuff. I'm barely 12 years old. I just say what I think might help.

dont get me wrong...uve been helping..KL fan

...and yes i decided i do love her...

O.K. I think this is a side-effect of puberty, no joke, but hey, if you really think you love her, then take a shot at it.

Like my (good) friend once told me: "Actions speak louder than words." I think she's right. ^_^

Gee...thanks. Nobody actually ever said that to me even though I help my best friend with her boyfriend. Hm... I might make a thread about that. Thanks again!

i think im past puberty.....and yah i think shes right too...

I don't think you can be any meaner Dark Bring....and guess what I'm only 16 ok?Don't worry, things will make sense later in life.

For now, just try to keep an open mind. It's perfectly natural if you cannot; let's face it, not many of us can. Oh, and keep a diary (not a blog/xanga/whatever).

Is 16 the legal restriction on consented sex that you answer by?

I do not advocate illegal sex of any manner.

i dont know all i know is that u kinda sounded alittle mean in that last post..sry if i misenterpreted it.... i know that i have keep my mind open but its very very hard...thx for the advise every1...i really apriciate it...

i dont know all i know is that u kinda sounded alittle mean in that last post..sry if i misenterpreted it.... i know that i have keep my mind open but its very very hard...thx for the advise every1...i really apriciate it...
No problem. Glad to help. ^_^

well...all i know is that this thing is realy tearing me apart....and there is some other stuff to my story too..to just complicate things......she likes to hang out with goth kids...and she is in to stuff that 15 yr olds shouldnt be in too....and every day she gets hurt somehow emotionaly...all i want is for her to be happy...and not get hurt by any1...

well...all i know is that this thing is realy tearing me apart....and there is some other stuff to my story too..to just complicate things......she likes to hang out with goth kids...and she is in to stuff that 15 yr olds shouldnt be in too....and every day she gets hurt somehow emotionaly...all i want is for her to be happy...and not get hurt by any1...
EDIT: Ignore this post.

Dark Bring's making me feel like a pimp :stoned:

XD

anyways...

you're 16, right?

high school?

meh.

i think im past puberty.....and yah i think shes right too...

You're 16 years old according to your profile. You're not out of puberty, you're in the middle of it.

well...all i know is that this thing is realy tearing me apart....and there is some other stuff to my story too..to just complicate things......she likes to hang out with goth kids...and she is in to stuff that 15 yr olds shouldnt be in too....and every day she gets hurt somehow emotionaly...all i want is for her to be happy...and not get hurt by any1...
Hey, if she likes hanging out with them and nothing bad happens to her, you should just leave it.

Yeah an i agree what you guys are saying. Heres my opinion , try and be happy once and a while and not so depressed about this becuse if you dont you may end up unhappy for the rest of your life maybe. So what if she doesnt like you so what life will keep going on and try not to get all made just becuse you dont have. Look here ive had a crush on the same person for about 10 years now but i try my best to overlook her and try not to think about her. And also as they said before try something you love to do and not think about her. You may be suprised of how much time youve spent without thinking about her.


Well theres my two cents. I pray for you and your troubles.

You're 16 years old according to your profile. You're not out of puberty, you're in the middle of it.


ok w/e.mabye i am...i dont know....stilll...i just dont know what to do.....

ok w/e.mabye i am...i dont know....stilll...i just dont know what to do....
That's exactly why we're giving you advice.

Well what do love to do?

Well what do love to do?
Rephrase that please

Well what do love to do?


huh?

What do you love to do?

hm.....i like playing ice hockey...but that costs alot of money...i like the computer....but when i go on the computer i think of her...i like playing guitar...thats one thing that sorta gets my mind off of her...its really the only thing i got...

So play the Guitar . I play the piano to get my mind of the girl i love or like i dunno.

What do you love to do?
What's that got to do with this?

To get his mind off of it her ofcourse.

the only problem..u might think im crazy...but sometimes when im playing guitar...i write songs for my band....thinking about her..and write lyrics how i feel...thats not going to help me get over her...

the only problem..u might think im crazy...but sometimes when im playing guitar...i write songs for my band....thinking about her..and write lyrics how i feel...thats not going to help me get over her...
I was thinking that that would happen.

Oh Sorry then I didnt know you did that. Well tell of other ways you can get your mind over her considering that it may remind you of heartbreak.

I was thinking that that would happen.

yah it is how it happens...i know how she feels about me though.....she thinks of me like a brother...and she doesnt want our friendship to go down the drain...and i can understand that ...but my feelings dont seem to realy go away...

yah it is how it happens...i know how she feels about me though.....she thinks of me like a brother...and she doesnt want our friendship to go down the drain...and i can understand that ...but my feelings dont seem to realy go away...
Hmmmm....tough. Gotta think about that. When I first read this, I already got the answer then it went away. Gotta go find it again.

well i got news for you mine doesnt go away either.

well i got news for you mine doesnt go away either.

i know..hey i gotta tell u though...u guys are really awesome for trying to help...i donno how many times i can say that lol....and the other day when she came over to my house...she got on her aim and 5 aim things poped up and said "i think im falling for u" that really hurt me....i know that i dont realy stand a chance..

I CAN'T FIND IT!!!!! DAMN BRAIN!

All I can say is this, "You really can't help it if she just thinks of you as a brother. I guess you're just gonna have to live your life that way until she actually realizes that you're the one for her."

i know..hey i gotta tell u though...u guys are really awesome for trying to help...i donno how many times i can say that lol....and the other day when she came over to my house...she got on her aim and 5 aim things poped up and said "i think im falling for u" that really hurt me....i know that i dont realy stand a chance..
Don't say that you don't stand a chance! She might like you later on in life.

Yeah i get that feeling alot.

ive also tried something else....ive tried looking for some1 else but for some reason...im not attacted to any1 in my school except her.......

Yeah ive tried that too. Have you ever thought that maybe shes not the one for you. You may find right girl in college or somewhere else.

ive also tried something else....ive tried looking for some1 else but for some reason...im not attacted to any1 in my school except her.......
You'll never find anyone by looking for them. Love will come to you when the time is right.

Yeah what she said.

yah i have thought of that....that worked for alittle bit until i saw her at school and thought the same about her..

yah i have thought of that....that worked for alittle bit until i saw her at school and thought the same about her..
you were talking about what piano's 2nd to last post right?

Love is like, a watermelon. You must watch it, until the time is right.


Then grab it valienty upon your mighty steed, whiskingly whisking it away in a torrent of passion. And suck the life out of it until it dies.

Then spit out the seeds, and plant some more. (:

Yeah ive tried that too. Have you ever thought that maybe shes not the one for you. You may find right girl in college or somewhere else.


this one..

this one..
that's the one i was talking about.

Yes but let me ask you another question. Is it her outer Beauty or inner beauty that you love?

Love is like, a watermelon. You must watch it, until the time is right.


Then grab it valienty upon your mighty steed, whiskingly whisking it away in a torrent of passion. And suck the life out of it until it dies.

Then spit out the seeds, and plant some more. (:
WTF?! Watcha mean by that? It kinda sounds a bit mean

Yes but let me ask you another question. Is it her outer Beauty or inner beauty that you love?
I think it's both, the way he talks.

Do not forget what I said at the begining, dwelling on this is somewhat going in the opposite direction. I wouldn't confess to love, especially if you don't feel it back. Not that it's weak to say it just... it's almost like admitting defeat. She won't love you just because you love her, ever. Instead of letting her be the main thing on your mind you should find other things to share your time and thought.

Do not forget what I said at the begining, dwelling on this is somewhat going in the opposite direction. I wouldn't confess to love, especially if you don't feel it back. Not that it's weak to say it just... it's almost like admitting defeat. She won't love you just because you love her, ever. Instead of letting her be the main thing on your mind you should find other things to share your time and thought.
Exactly how do you know that she'll never ever like him? Have you been to the future?

Hey its just unrequited love for ya.

Let me ask you something, maybe you'll understand. If I told you I loved you over and over, would you love me? I'm not saying she will never love him, just that him loving/obsessing over her will not bring it, and that's for certain.

Hey its just unrequited love for ya.
Yea, and it may be answered later on in life.

Let me ask you something, maybe you'll understand. If I told you I loved you over and over, would you love me? I'm not saying she will never love him, just that him loving/obsessing over her will not bring it, and that's for certain.
That's why he starts showing her and not just tell her.

Yes thats most ceartainly what im talking about. Loving her is not enogh if she doesnt love you back.

Yes but let me ask you another question. Is it her outer Beauty or inner beauty that you love?

both...

DiamondSeraph: should i just show her how i feel insted of telling her then...or just stop thinking about her? because thats tough

Edit: KL fan i dont really think that shes going to fall for me...and if i think that shes going to fall for me then ill like her more...so i cant really do that..

At this moment he can never show her that he loves her, only that he obsesses. I believe that true love comes from both parties. Love is a flame all on it's own, not man equipped with a match and candle... one does not manipulate true love.


Badger: Both sort of, you need to let go a little, then your feelings will be less overwhelming.

Yes thats most ceartainly what im talking about. Loving her is not enogh if she doesnt love you back.
For most people. This one Japanese guy who's now a comedian in the Philippines liked this dancer from the Philippines and she never loved him back but still it's enough for the guy. This is a true story.

At this moment he can never show her that he loves her, only that he obsesses. I believe that true love comes from both parties. Love is a flame all on it's own, not man equipped with a match and candle... one does not manipulate true love.


Badger: Both sort of, you need to let go a little, then your feelings will be less overwhelming.
That's the freakin' stupidass reason why he needs to be patient.

@ Badger: Oh yeah, and I forgot to tell you, "If you actually really love her, you would let her go." This is only if you don't think you can't wait forever for her to answer you.

You need to show her your not just that person in that class you need to show her your not that and if you have no backbone to do that , than she may not like you. Sorry no offense.

You need to show her your not just that person in that class you need to show her your not that and if you have no backbone to do that , than she may not like you. Sorry no offense.
Rephrase please. I kinda don't get it.

i really dont know wat to say......shes the kinda girl that also sends mixed signels....one minute shes cuddling with me...the next she doesnt want anything to do with me...and that keeps me attached too....and the jealousy of her liking other ppl is really hurting me too..

i really dont know wat to say......shes the kinda girl that also sends mixed signels....one minute shes cuddling with me...the next she doesnt want anything to do with me...and that keeps me attached too....and the jealousy of her liking other ppl is really hurting me too..
Don't be freakin' jealous just because she likes other guys. That won't do anything for you.

Don't be freakin' jealous just because she likes other guys. That won't do anything for you.

i realize that....but that doesnt stop the jealousy

Yes that will happen.

KL FAN: i ment he needs to show that he is more than the person she sees everday and thathe needs to be more than that. But if he does not have enogh backbone to do it, than she may stop likeing him more than just a friend.

Yes that will happen.

KL FAN: i ment he needs to show that he is more than the person she sees everday and thathe needs to be more than that. But if he does not have enogh backbone to do it, than she may stop likeing him more than just a friend.

o i can show her that.....

i realize that....but that doesnt stop the jealousy
Try to think that she doesn't like them and that She's just friends with them.

Try to think that she doesn't like them and that She's just friends with them.

lol kinda funny....this is sorta making fun of myself but hey...i talked to her about it and she said that there just friends lol...

OH well yeah sorry. But i ment that you trully like her. And try to find some time with her to talk and show your feelings like that or just to sort all out.

hey.....just a little thing to add....ive never had a girl friend...can u tell? im so bad with girls its unbelievable...

Yeah but do you ever talk to her in private like. Yeah ive never had a girlfriend either.

um.....yes...online...and i can call her...i donno about any other times...i would be able to get her in private though...if i needed too...

Just make sure shes not (online) talking with her friends too.

Mmm I have a girlfriend and before that I've had my heart handed to me on a silver platter on at least twice... and I wish I had someone to tell me the things I've told you back then (actually come to think of it I probably wouldn't listen to them). I really hope you'll take what I said into account.

i will i realy will...u guys have helped me alot...

Your most ceartailly welcome. But i wish i could have enough courageto talk to the girl i like.

Your most ceartailly welcome. But i wish i could have enough courageto talk to the girl i like.

sometimes its tough....i can barely talk to her because every time i talk to her about this i realize that she says the same thing every time...and its really not worth it..."i dont think of u like that..ur like a brother to me..and ur going to have to get over me"

Yes well im not even sure how she fells about me. Becuse im so afraid of getting rejected and her not liking me at all.

Yes well im not even sure how she fells about me. Becuse im so afraid of getting rejected and her not liking me at all.

if i have learned anything in the last 2 years....ive learned to ask some1 out without thinking that shes giong to say yes....because i was so excited the girl i liked would say yes that i was shocked....back when i asked her out the first time

Yes well yeah your right. But she always seems so busy to even get a word in because its not like shes alone ever . Because i would hate to do it in public.

....theres always something right? the girl i like likes my best friend....went out with my other best friend....and isnt a vergin any more because of some goth kid...

Shes not or hes not.

there both not....lol...they did it toghether.....shes only 14 i donno if this is wat u guys think but i think thats to young..

Ah yeah and you love her? Is she pregnant?

:cry: i hope not!....and i do love her...

Oh, well then thats maybe why she does not to get in another realationship.

she doesnt wanna get into another relationship because shes pregnant? because i know for sure shes not pregnant lol...i donno if thats what u ment lol...

Well you did say you'd hope she wasn't o.k.

im confused.......ok...little update on my curent situation...im kinda feeling better to just get everything out of my system..even if its to ppl i have no clue who they are its better then no1...even though im stil thinking about her alot mabye ill think about something else now..

Likewise

Yes try and do that . Well i at least know that the girl i love has never been in a realationship .

so heres what i got....try to get activitys to not think about her....show her how u feel and not tell her...try and think of her as if she isnt right for me...find some1 else...and many many more...

Yes thats basicly what we have been talking about this hour.

i have to say this too....theres so much more to this story of me and this mystory girl....2 years of things that cause me to love her...this is how ive been feeling the whole time...

Yeah well just think ablout how 9 - 10 years trying to figure out if you really love that girl and its a mystery to me to . Girls are something else.

but yet we love them anyways...and im sure they think of us the same way lol....back on topic....if there is any more advice plz give it...i need as much as i can get..

Well all i can tell you is to just listen to your heart, i know that sounds a little girly but it may come in handy . Just to what it tells you and follow it.

ive followed my heart and she still says were always going to be friends nothing more nothing less...

Well there you go. IF she said that then do you think it maybe was not to be.

i know its not ment to be...i just hope that i can get over her because i become to crushed

O.k. good luck.

thx guys...i feel alittle better....

guys i just looked at her myspace and some1 put a comment and said "no u wernt a tag along i hope u didnt get in trouble with ur parents thought" i hope that that doesnt mean something really bad

guys i just looked at her myspace and some1 put a comment and said "no u wernt a tag along i hope u didnt get in trouble with ur parents thought" i hope that that doesnt mean something really bad
SHE HAS A MYSPACE?! Can You Please PM Me The URL? PLEASE?!

I don't think it means anything bad.

Edit: im sry i cannot show u her myspace its really risky...i dont want any1 to talk to her...because that would be disasterus...

well....if i show u u would have to promise me that u wont talk to her....and u wil see what i mean by shes with the wrong crowd...i fell in love with her long before she went goth...
I swear I won't talk to her. Just wanna look at her MySpace.

ok....and mine is http://www.myspace.com/badgerglue

ok....and mine is http://www.myspace.com/badgerglue
Off Topic: badgerglue again?

On Topic: So do you think that you know what you're gonna do with the girl now?

i guess just try and get over her..she obviously doesnt like me....i donno though


sry i gtg to bed right now ...ill check what u guys say tommorow..

what?

sry i gtg to bed right now ...ill check what u guys say tommorow..
What what?

sry i edited the last post....i didnt get what u said at first..

i guess just try and get over her..she obviously doesnt like me....i donno though


sry i gtg to bed right now ...ill check what u guys say tommorow..
In the present, she likes you as a friend and brother. In the future, you'll never know. You can try and get over her or just wait for her to realize that SHE CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT YOU (if that will ever happen).

NOTE: The capitalized words, I know, is a bit too girlish even for me but hey I am after all a girl so I can do that.

Gee nine pages in the space of let's see, 6 hours, that's pretty good.

Beer works well

and how come its never 'how to get over a guy?'



Guys fall in love more when they are younger and fall in love less when they are older. Girls are the opposite and fall in love more when older, mainly because when they are younger, they look better.

Yeah nine pages was a lot man.

Firstly, nice to see you back on ichigos badger.

Off topic - @Ashtr - I didn't see Dark Bring say you were a pimp or even implying it. -_- To be honest, I think you've been getting a little too hot-headed recently. When I first talked to you, you weren't like this at all. It'd be nice to cool it for your own good. (I'm just being helpful even though it sounds a bit mean)

Ok. Having read though the last 9 pages, basically I think don't bother with her anymore. Any glimmer of hope just won't happen. You'll be much better off getting over her then trying to still get with her. Seeing guys chase after something they can't have is painful to watch as well as it is for the actual guy.

When you refered to her being confusing (the cuddle stuff) that's just her being normal. I read somewhere that many guys mistake this for attraction. A girl sometimes doesn't realise this and this is what confuses a lot of guys. In other words, don't rely on this to think you've got a chance. Only if a girl is finding any excuse to touch you, she might like you, but otherwise I wouldn't think so just because it's hard to tell in most cases.

I think the best way to get over someone is to forget that they exist. The less you think about her the better. Stop talking to her so that nothing can come up to interfere with the process of "getting over her". After a substantial period of time, you'd just see her as a friend hopefully, if you ever bump into her again.

Don't get jealous of other guys. They probably have their fair share of rejection too (even the good-looking ones).

You'll find someone else. If not, you're not looking hard enough.;)

@An-Kun:i know that she doesnt like me like that but when i did fall for her i fell for her because of that affection...i was younger then and realize that its just playful...and i relized that when she said no...but so much have happend since that moment...and i like her so much more now...we are best friends so it will be really hard to not talk to her...i will look harder for girls that i like....and forgeting she exists would be impossible because i care about her for more then "like" i love her as a friend too...she relies on me being there for her...i hope...and i do give that to her...

@Hawq: im not really into beer lol...

Ok, I was just answering the how to get over her bit. I don't see the point of making a thread if you aren't going to try and get over her. I never said getting over someone was easy but it certainly ain't impossible. I'd say don't rely on her too much then.

yah im going to trying all this stuff..im just saying that well basicly what u just said....its going to be hard..

Edit today i realized some stuff that i never really relized before talking to u guys and im accually starting to get over her...i couldnt do it without u all.....thx alot...im not exactly over her yet but im getting closer...

Guys fall in love more when they are younger and fall in love less when they are older. Girls are the opposite and fall in love more when older, mainly because when they are younger, they look better.

You'll find someone else. If not, you're not looking hard enough.;)
I kinda have to agree with you there but sometimes it's not true.

I thought you read every single page. If you did, surely you must have seen my post that said, "You'll never find anyone by looking for them. Love will come to you when the time is right." That's the way life is ok? The more you search for something the harder it will get. At least that's what I live by.

I thought you read every single page. If you did, surely you must have seen my post that said, "You'll never find anyone by looking for them. Love will come to you when the time is right." That's the way life is ok? The more you search for something the harder it will get. At least that's what I live by.

yah i know i know....if i can just get over her then mabye ill be able to stop wanting a girl friend so much....to get over her...lol...if that makes any sence...then i wont look as hard

i checked out her space an ouch, it must have hit you hard when she turned goth right?

i checked out her space an ouch, it must have hit you hard when she turned goth right?

yes...but i still love her the same outer looks arnt importent...

Hey but how did she convert to being a goth anyway?

I think it was peer pressure like everyother person that becomes goth.

shes a really depressed person...shes been hurt alot in her life...her parents fight all the time.....her mom and dad are alcoholics....and she just decided because of some of the ppl that she hanged out with....i want her to go back to what she was like before but i know i cant control her life....

yup, peer pressure and parental influence (I think)

her mom lets her drink....i called her one day and she said "Sry evan(my name) im sorta wasted!"

... thats sad, a parent letting her daughter drink illegally, is she around 16 or something?

Off subject:Yeah, but you should stay true to your self and not what others want you to be. Then your just throwing your own life away to them , the people who control your very life, and soon enough they start getting you on to drugs and thats not good. So its just best for her to just stay away from goths.

ON subject: Another theory, is if you show her you love her enogh by getting her away from them, then she'll know you care about you and maybe start to like you more .This is also just a theory. O.K.

But if your sayin that you just want to not like her anymore, then you should just forget about her. And i know that you say thats impossible, but just really try and remind yourself thats shes not the one, go on with your own life and try not think if she'll get mad at you about that ,because she had her chance.

Well thats all i can think of to say.

yah...all i want is for her to be happy and not have that stuff in her life...

Yes,its better to think what would make her happy, but if need be, make an intervention that'll set her straight of her evil ways of the goths and come back to the light side,lol, thats sounds so corny right there ok. But try and see what happens.

Awwww youngins and their lovins...it's just too cute!

Oh yes. That...love. 'thing.'

Its been half a year, and still those evil, daunting thoughts claw at me like some vile creature of the night.


curse you woman. May a pack of vile squirrels feast upon your rotting carcass.

why not try posting her picture on a dart board? 50 points for those who can shoot it on her eyeball!!

I kinda have to agree with you there but sometimes it's not true.

I thought you read every single page. If you did, surely you must have seen my post that said, "You'll never find anyone by looking for them. Love will come to you when the time is right." That's the way life is ok? The more you search for something the harder it will get. At least that's what I live by.

Yeah I didn't agree with your statement though. That's why I said what I said.

I know I'm just popping in and have probably missed a LOT of information regarding this but I'm going to give hints to all of you.

1st and foremost: Don't worry about anyone other than those close to you
2nd: If you have feelings for someone let it be known.
3rd: If they ignore you then don't continue on like it never happened. If it bothers you then avoid said love for a week till things get under control again.
4th: Do not be blind to the obvious. If you think something is amiss, ask other people.
5th: Make friends with the significant other that has seemed to grow onto the hide of said love. Unless he's a total dipshit and insults you every ten minutes or so.
6th: Get a significant other yourself so you can have a reason to stay away from said love. Two things may happen because of this; You may find that the significant other you have is better for you, the latter of the two being said love figures out they need you.
7th: Find a freakin hobby, read a book, make a model, jack off to porn! Something to get your mind off of said love.
8th: Regret nothing! It will just leave you feeling sorry for yourself.
9th: Don't be the only one of your friends without a significant other. Trust me when I say hanging out with your friends can become hell.
10th: Never bottle anything in, like playing with fire kiddies.
11th: Do what you feel is right. Don't try half assed schemes to win over the love of your life. It'll work in the immediate future, but it won't in the long run.
12th: If the said love is into drugs and what not, and you aren't. Stay away from them. You don't want to get mixed into drug problems when your staying sober.

Thats about all I can say openly. I've had this problem for about a year, and I can only say that the hurt can grow over time almost as fast as it can go away. Eventually by loving her you have to hope she betters herself.

Signed The Loveless Wonder
Shadow

@Theshadowofdoubt: i get everything ur saying and i will try all of those things....and acually i think she is into drugs and right now im sorta depressed about that situation because i know i dont want her to do that...and theres nothing i can do...shes stil a really good friend though...i dont want to stay away from her because of that...

@frozen_shadow: um....tell me why would i wanna do that? i dont wanna HATE her i just wanna not have feelings for her...but still be friends...

@Frozen_shadow qtd. in Badgerglue: The fastest way to get over someone is to hate them. That's why he said that.

Just be thankful that she recoginses you as a person. A unrequited love is far better than no love at all. In situations (yours) like these, it is best if waited it out. The scales may tip to your favor, or against what you wanted. Regardless, time /will/ change the factors.

Funny, I was reading some of Soren Kierkegaard's (a Philosopher) letters today and I found an interesting entry:


Disject Membra, 1842

... And it was the delight of his eyes and his heart's desire. And he streched forth his hand and took hold of it, but he could not retain it; it was offered to him, but he could not possess it alas, for it was the the delight of his eyes and his heart's desire. And his soul was near to despair; but he chose the greater suffereing, of losing it and giving it up, to the lesser, which was to possess it without right; or to speak more truly... he chose the lesser suffereing of being without it rather than to possess it at the cost of his peace of soul... and strange to relate, it came to pass that it was for his good.

And what does this mean? Basically that desires are met and are always just beyond our grasp, but sometimes it's best to let them go; for better the person.

Disject Membra, 1842

... And it was the delight of his eyes and his heart's desire. And he streched forth his hand and took hold of it, but he could not retain it; it was offered to him, but he could not possess it alas, for it was the the delight of his eyes and his heart's desire. And his soul was near to despair; but he chose the greater suffereing, of losing it and giving it up, to the lesser, which was to possess it without right; or to speak more truly... he chose the lesser suffereing of being without it rather than to possess it at the cost of his peace of soul... and strange to relate, it came to pass that it was for his good.

And what does this mean? Basically that desires are met and are always just beyond our grasp, but sometimes it's best to let them go; for better the person.
Yeah, I wonder why hardly anybody does that though. Instead of letting go they just keep him/her.

ok....i guess i have to tell u guys this something that i realized today...i guess i was getting the thought of liking her mixed up with wanting to help her....im slowly getting over her because of that fact....i just want her to be happy..when shes happy i am....i only thought i liked her...i know this might be a really suden turn of events but if i believe that i only wanna help her is true then i dont think about her as much as i used to when i thought of her being with me.....i told her this today...that im always going to be here and that i want to help her.....she didnt respond exactly how i wanted her too...she said "evan im getting pissed at you for always getting into this part of my life just let me get threw this myself...thx for trying but i dont need it..." so i guess all i can do is let go right?...i dont want her to be pissed at me....

i dont know if u guys get what i mean by this sudden change its very complicated...ok? .....

Okay, I learned this the hard way, and no means to be mean.



But when a girl doesn't want you to get involed....

don't get involed.

ok ill back down i guess...

Yeah, just wait til the fire cools down a bit (i.e. 2 or 3 months). then check up on her and pick up where you left off. Preferably as friends.

yah......im guessing that if she found this forem thing that im talking about her in she would explode right?...lol yah that would suck..i just really needed help...


edit:still haveing trouble getting her out of my mind any suggestens for how to get over that?

my best bet....get involved with school activities, any events that may happen....anything to forget about her..

and don't do what I did...."Turn away and never look back" I tried to avoid her, which made it even impossible to get over her. (Since she's in about 2 of my classes.) long story short, let's just say, I made a big mistake

go and socialize! there are tons of girls out there who are single! im not saying you should forget her, just that there's more to life than just her. as they say, the lake has many fishes. do you get what im saying? good ^_^

you need to get your brain to associate her with friendship rather than anything else. its Very hard to do and is harder if its been a longer time.
Frozen_shadow has it right. socialising and having fun is best. Ive gone out and partied to get over things, a bi-product was me getting drunk, i talked to my friends who were a great comfort and then danced. *boogies on down*

But if you're getting over her and just want what's best for her, that's a good thing, right? I mean, then you can be friends.

I'm not really good at this kinda of things. I still can't tell the difference between, liking someone, having a crush or just wanting to be good friends.

I dunno, just try and socialize, like everyone else says, hang out with your friends and talk and stuff. Just well, go along with life and find other things that make you happy. Surely there are other things that make you happy?

I wanted the best for one of my exs, but she has succeded in messing up alot more since me. But its best to let them choose their own path and accept it or you'll get hurt with every bad decision.
Friendship all depends on the nature of the breakup.

guys I HAD THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE TODAY!!!....for some reason somthing just clicked...i dont know why....but i didnt feel the same way about her...and she came over today and we went to a youth group and we had fun toghether and for once i thought of her as a friend insted of wanting her...i havent thought about her at school at all except for when i was thinking about not thinking about her lol....but anyways it feels great...and when she hugged my friends i didnt feel anything...just aww...thats cute...lol...i think im getting over her!!! and i owe it all to u guys and my friends and stuff...thX!!!!!

Good to hear! Now if I could get over my current problem...

Good to hear! Now if I could get over my current problem...

whats ur problem?

Deleted upon request

i guess there isnt really a point to this thread any more since im basicly over her....i asked a girl out i liked today some1 other then her....i guess she was wat was holding me back because i was really shy before this....of corse the girl said no but he w/e lol....

well you could leave it open in case somebody else has a similar problem.

ok ill change the name to something that every1 can come in withe there problems

edit: u cant change the name can u?:heh:

ive had the same problem for a while. ( fellings sarted 3 years and 2 weeks ago, pain started 2 years 6 months 1 weeks and a half ago) im sorry to say, in my case, there is no tricks tips, way out. if your feelings are true, and it cant work, the only thing left is suffering and a lot of it. for a long time. this does not happen if you are A. lucky and it works out B. not in love C. a frikking robot or someting D. another option that i havent heard of that might still exist.

ok I know this is going to sound harsh and a bit out of character for me to say this but, there's something seriously wrong if you can't get over one girl. Go see a psychologist, or more realistically, wake up and face reality - she's not the one. You can't force people to love you. It sounds like you're drowning and not even trying to swim to the surface. Move on, gain your breath back again. Fight against the weight that ties you down. It'll only make you more miserable if you don't try. EVERYONE goes through this stage once in their life. A large majority get through it shaken, but fine. It's quite pathetic to see someone not even try to get through unrequieted love. I mean no offence. I'm just trying to get you thinking straight. Sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind.

ok I know this is going to sound harsh and a bit out of character for me to say this but, there's something seriously wrong if you can't get over one girl. Go see a psychologist, or more realistically, wake up and face reality - she's not the one. You can't force people to love you. It sounds like you're drowning and not even trying to swim to the surface. Move on, gain your breath back again. Fight against the weight that ties you down. It'll only make you more miserable if you don't try. EVERYONE goes through this stage once in their life. A large majority get through it shaken, but fine. It's quite pathetic to see someone not even try to get through unrequieted love. I mean no offence. I'm just trying to get you thinking straight. Sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind.


dude im sry to say this but basicly just saying "snap out of it" does not work........

an-kun's suggestion works for me though. but it takes an awfully LONG while

dude im sry to say this but basicly just saying "snap out of it" does not work........

Well, it worked for me. It takes a while to work. Plus you're getting there because you tried.

Well, it worked for me. It takes a while to work. Plus you're getting there because you tried.

well accually now that i think aobut it...i did sorta just snap out of it...but i didnt do it on my will..i just all the sudden stoped liking her....lol......

i enjoy burning all pictures of her, because fire makes me distracted, plus you dont have pictures to remind you, but ive had trouble getting over this one girl.

i did, but it wasnt easy

the best advice, is to go out on dates with other people, see who suites you.
i tried this, it worked for a while, until the girl found out bout my previous gf, the girl was obsesive *shudder*

otherwise, just keep trying, time heals all wounds, but it needs some help

i enjoy burning all pictures of her, because fire makes me distracted, plus you dont have pictures to remind you, but ive had trouble getting over this one girl.

i did, but it wasnt easy

the best advice, is to go out on dates with other people, see who suites you.
i tried this, it worked for a while, until the girl found out bout my previous gf, the girl was obsesive *shudder*

otherwise, just keep trying, time heals all wounds, but it needs some help


hehe...i cant get a date x_x

no need to rush! my parents got married when they were in their 20's. we've all got a long way to go and there are better things to mind rather than romantic love ;)

20 isn't a long way to go...

That's quite young to get married I think.

Umm...so...how do you get over a dude?

Umm...so...how do you get over a dude?

Chocolate!

Hmm.. kind of sad-never had a girlfriend (R/L)

Hmm.. kind of sad-never had a girlfriend (R/L)

That doesn't make you sad. BTW, don't go desperate. XD

In fact, my first GF was a fucktard and I regret having not killed her. She's also an idiot and voluntarily turned bi; I hope she burns in hell. Amen. :)

most girls ive been out with ended up being or were bi...how bizzare

im almost 16 and ive never had a gf...i dont know whats wrong with me...if there is anything...i just recently asked out 2 girls and both of them dont like me but my best friend....it sucks....

Wow, there's a lot of bitter young souls on here!

After a few tries in high school, I gave up looking for love there. It's all immature and it's not always emotionally healthy the way kids treat each other there. I didn't have my first real partner until after I left home. Don't worry about what everyone else may think, just be true to yourself.

No matter what, don't lose hope. Keep focused on education, and keep in mind that in College, it's a whole different ball game.

There will be plenty more opportunities for life and love. Maintaining a positive attitude is key to making things happen.

im almost 16 and ive never had a gf...i dont know whats wrong with me...if there is anything...i just recently asked out 2 girls and both of them dont like me but my best friend....it sucks....
Don't worry and relax and UForgotten is correct. You haven't lost hope and you shouldn't. You will meet that special person one day!

@ Marlon: How do you ever even consider that a relationship. You people didn't even go on a single date. The people in my school don't know the diffrence between a date and a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship. ughh *sigh*<_<

Don't worry and relax and UForgotten is correct. You haven't lost hope and you shouldn't. You will meet that special person one day!

Exactly, and because of that, you shouldn't be worrying about going out with someone just for the hell of it or because your age has gone out with someone (or because you're desperate XD ); if you do it, do it simply because maybe there's a chance of that person being that special someone. ^_^

im almost 16 and ive never had a gf...i dont know whats wrong with me...if there is anything...i just recently asked out 2 girls and both of them dont like me but my best friend....it sucks....

Don't worry about it. You should only worry when you're hitting 30.

yeah, dont worry too much. most teenage relationships dont last up to marriage. they usually end in months.

yeah, dont worry too much. most teenage relationships dont last up to marriage. they usually end in months.

So true. At my school, if a guy or a girl get together I make bets on how long they last. I got five dollars a few days ago for saying this one couple would only last 11 days. (I was going with the pointspread from the superbowl, hehe). Anyways, don't sweat it. Relationships are overrated.

11 days? wow

i didnt go out with anyone till i was 17... its not a big deal, my friend is 20 and still no one.

hmm, i always find dating fun, it gives me something to do, i only had one or two serious relationships, and they ended bad, so i decided to ate for fun, and its working, so far, i guess its cuz i can play all feilds, cool, laid back, extreme, geeky, you name it, i can fit in if i want to, i just dont want to, so i can get any type of girl, as long as i know them. this realy keeps life kinda light, which is good

so basically, dont do any serious relationships until you are a little older, if you want to date for fun go ahead, but dont take any serious ones

my best friend today said that i was pathetic because i couldnt get a girlfriend......it made me feel bad...and i also realized how much i pushed the girl i liked for 2 years.....and i dont wanna do that....and im so lonely

Nah enjoy being single! It's a pain having to push away all the attractive girls that want you when you've got a girlfriend.

i dont have a significant other either. do i feel bad about it? not at all. being in a relationship takes a lot of understanding, trust, and money!! it'll ruin your studies because its a huge distraction.

i would like to know what it feels like...u know....i just feel bad about being alone and having no girlfriend to come over and cuddle with or something like that...mabye if i can get one i wil enjoy being single but i dont feel right right now.....

First of all, you are 15. You have a long long way to figuring out the purpose of love (other than making lots and lots of babies, of course). But it is natural to be curious as it's just your hormones going haywire. XD

Girls are an interesting specie. This girl liked me... I liked her... I was too pussy to ask her out and then lost her. So, I'm proud that you did express your feelings - that's very admiral.

Just enjoy being single and if you get lonely, there's always your right hand ;)

@Seph - I am sure that happened to me as well. I like this one girl at school, and it was obvious she liked me as well. Though, I think I said like: nothing to her at all, but it was a feeling.

Stupid me, I was way to shy and nervious to ask her to hang-out sometime. I am sure she does not like me now. Fa' sho' (As my 'home boy's' say it.)

now that i dont like the girl that i was trying to get over....there is no1 at my school that i like...it sucks here.lol...and i have this emtpy feeling in my mind u know?

U know at first i thought it was good to hav
a girl at a young age
but i realized that as a mistake
I've been workin out this question
Les see u try it
How many pairs at a young age
stick together after finishing that school
My answer is just a theory for now
Cuz im still not sure yet
My ANSWER
NONE

Just find another girl to love.

I've been in a pretty obsessive relationship, and I pretty much got over it by finding interests in other women.

Thats the quickest, and sure fire way to do it.

U know at first i thought it was good to hav
a girl at a young age
but i realized that as a mistake
I've been workin out this question
Les see u try it
How many pairs at a young age
stick together after finishing that school
My answer is just a theory for now
Cuz im still not sure yet
My ANSWER
NONE

some people are mature enough to handle it so it works out for them. I know a few couples that have stuck together after finishing school.

@badgerglu - er...people trying to find a girlfriend/boyfriend tend to put people off or start pointless relationships because of the desperation they feel rather than just letting love happen on its own. Also, most of the time you have to stick to finding someone with about the same level of looks as yourself. It's rare to get someone better looking than you unless you're a girl.

Ah well we can choose who we want to love..
but in the end we can't choose not to love ^_^
I don't know... I bad at relationships. I don't ask for em usually except in one isolated case...
... ah well ^_^